From Letterman:
Top Ten Signs Lance Armstrong Is Getting Cocky
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Race starts at 9, Lance rolls out of bed around noon.
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Has already figured out that the trophy can hold a three gallon margarita.
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He eats frosting by the fistful.
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For the last leg, he rode one of those crazy 1920’s bikes with the big front wheel.
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Deliberately crashing into things to get more air time on Sportscenter.
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Making a couple extra bucks delivering pizzas during the race.
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After the starter pistol is fired, he hangs around hitting on French babes.
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Turns to the other riders and says, “Oooh, I’m sooooo scared.”
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Instead of training, spent last two months pimping his bike.
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Has started selling ad space on his ass.