Suspect you meant this for @TurboGainz and not me. All good.
I have met Gabor Mate’, think he is brilliant in many ways - and well worth reading. He believes ADHD is a trauma response, and I disagree.
This is different than being diagnosed late in life. I wonder how you got diagnosed with ADHD in the 70’s since I know you are my contemporary. It would have been hyperactive and you would have been on Ritalin if I am correct - been wrong before.
But imagine masking for forty years, dealing with zero to rage in seconds, rejection dysphoria, without knowing that you are ND. Just knowing you’re not normal.
For sure. Ironically, I had a pretty busy day at work today which is unusual and I had a lot less time to browse reddit or youtube, and I feel lighter and have more mental clarity and energy.
I’ve been an internet user since like 2006, played games was on forums made friends and all that, and it was a little bit of a problem but it was mostly positive because it allowed me to express myself and make friends that were into the same stuff I was into. Then in 2013 I got into self help and I would listen to youtube videos while I worked in warehouses and stuff and that might have been veering into addiction but I still learned a ton about sales and whatnot. But in 2022 YouTube Shorts became a thing and I got a desk job and now it’s just an addiction.
I’m not gaining anything from it, I’m just filling space and time. And it’s a double whammy because it is taking my time away from me and it’s also taking my energy away from me. These social media companies have a lot of us by the balls and they know it. They have replaced every facet of entertainment, socialization and education with their products to the point where most people don’t own CDs, movies, books, real life friends, etc. anymore, so when someone does try to quit they don’t have anything to replace it with then they come back.
Haha I do have the zero to rage and I never really realized it until you just said that. I don’t have angry outbursts though, I just get upset and shut down. I didn’t know that was an ADHD thing!
But what Friedrich said is totally valid and so helpful. It’s not a contest!
I didn’t log this the day of and I can’t remember much so that’s why stuff is empty
Calories:
Sleep Night Before:
Mood:
Energy Level:
Hunger Level:
Workout: Monday Upper. I just didn’t have much juice today. I had first set strength on everything, but I just didn’t have endurance and lost reps on all the other sets. I think this was due to me increasing water and decreasing sodium over the past few days. I have been having this head pressure come and go and I thought maybe my blood pressure was high so I cut sodium a little and increased water and while that did get rid of the head pressure, it also made me weak and feel weird. Like I feel too loose. I have a BP cuff and it has never read high on me and I’ve never had high BP at dentist or dr other than one time I was on 4 hours of sleep and 2 cups of coffee before the dentist and it was only 125/85 or something. So the head pressure is probably not due to high BP.
Steps: 7500
Thought Process: I high tailed it to the movies after and I saw this movie called Faces of Death (2026). It sucked but it was a better time than sitting at home. It’s been a while since anything has interested me in theaters. I used to go twice a week or more but haven’t in a while. And since AMC stopped selling beef jerkey it makes me even less likely to go. But tonight I put a banana, beef jerky and almonds in a ziploc bag and snuck it in there. The banana got kind of mushy and sweet due to being peeled sitting in the bag for a little while and it actually tasted really good with the almonds.
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4/7/2026
Calories: 1935
Sleep Night Before: 7 hours
Mood: good
Energy Level: 6/10
Hunger Level: 5/10
Workout: Tuesday Lower + 30 mins elliptical. I am officially progressing my RDL. A couple weeks ago I was stuck at 240lbs for 9 reps (1 set only). Today I did 200lbs for 3 sets of 12 and it was actually pretty damn easy! I am focusing on keeping my lats depressed and keep the bar going in a straight line. It almost feels like a reverse of a lat exercise. 240 for 9 is 2160, 200 for 12 is 2400, plus doing 3 sets instead of one. Good feel in lower back and glutes.
I really don’t know what I’m doing with the leg curl and leg extension. I mean I guess I’m progressing them, but I’m not as good at it yet like I am other exercises. Leg curl is hard to know because I PR RDL before doing them. Leg Extensions idk either. I’ve been using basically the same weight on them for the past month or so. I will say that I am getting better at Leg Curls and they had a good pump today so that’s great. Leg Extensions I wanted to do 110lbs for 3 sets of 12 but I accidentally set it to 120lbs and got an accidental PR.
I really like the elliptical. It’s so much more fun than incline walking or riding the bike.
Steps: 8000 (this includes the “steps” on the elliptical because I had my phone in my pocket)
Thought Process: One thing I thought about is trying to want to go to the gym without thinking about progression. What if I was never going to progress again? How would I make it fun to do? Because right now I get excited about progression, but that makes going to the gym a conditional enjoyment. When I think about going to the gym I usually think into the future about what PR I’m excited to hit, but what if I get to the point where a PR is few and far between? What if I’m kind of tired and just don’t have the gusto to hit a PR that day?
I actually had another thing I was thinking about today that I was going to write about, but I flat out forgot what it was. It’ll probably come to me again though.
Thought Process: One thing I thought about is trying to want to go to the gym without thinking about progression. What if I was never going to progress again? How would I make it fun to do? Because right now I get excited about progression, but that makes going to the gym a conditional enjoyment. When I think about going to the gym I usually think into the future about what PR I’m excited to hit, but what if I get to the point where a PR is few and far between? What if I’m kind of tired and just don’t have the gusto to hit a PR that day?
This sounds like an excellent opportunity to make the method the goal.
My kid is super into Duolingo. They have a 450+ day streak going right now. They don’t really care about progressing in their language ability: even though that’s happening as a RESULT of them doing their daily Duolingo. For them, the fun is seeing how high they can get that unbroken streak. To the point that it can be 10 minutes before bedtime and they go “I forgot to Duolingo!” and we manage to cram in a lesson before it’s done.
I’m in a similar way with my physical therapy. Right now, my knee is no longer in pain, but I haven’t missed a day of the PT since I started. I probably could, and be fine, but I like knowing that I’ve done everything in my power to keep the knee pain away by not missing a day.
And on a more macro level: I’m 40 and started exercising when I was 14. Even after rupturing my ACL, I’ve never taken more than a week off of training, and they were always scheduled weeks off (deloads). I weigh the same as I did in college, which, if you look at that from a numbers perspective, means I haven’t made any progress…until I look at my peers from college and see that they’re all about 40-50 pounds heavier in “non-lean mass”. I’m here not because I always progressed, but because I kept the streak going.
That was not my intent and I am sorry if that was how the post sounded. @Friedrich and I went to the same grad school and have been “acquaintances” on this site for a few years. I meant it to be conversational and not a “contest,” but I understand how it could have been misinterpreted.
I struggle with context when posting, think it is the AuDHD, but still my responsibility.
I should have been more specific. This is true. We (The_Myth and I) did go to graduate school at the same institution. We are about the same age (I believe), and have been acquainted on these logs for a couple of years now. Once I had time, and felt well enough, to go back through the posts, there was nothing that was an issue. I recognize no offense was intended.
Workout: Thursday Upper. I guess I’ve gotten all my muscle memory gains because my gains have really slowed down the past 2 weeks. I am still progressing but it’s slower and harder. I used to be really hungry after workouts but now it barely makes me hungry and my strength and size isn’t going up massively like it was a month ago.
I’m definitely leaner and more muscular though. I am still around the same weight too. I have lost a noticeable amount of fat on my face and my arms. Chest and stomach losing a little.
Steps: 7000
Thought Process: Nothing really to say today. I was trying to think of something I could do to improve but right now I think I just have to keep going and progressing. I’m not hitting any great PRs or losing a lot of fat at one time but I am progressing, just slowly.
In the past 7 sessions (3.5 weeks), my tricep extension has gone up by 3 reps. Idk if that’s normal. My OHP has gone up 3-4 reps. My pullups have gone up 3-4 reps as well at around the same weight.
I’ve also noticed that my quads have been stalled for like 2-3 weeks on leg extensions. I’m going to try squats again tomorrow. I still have butt wink even on bodyweight squats with my heels on weight plates so I’m just not going to go all the way down. When I used to squat, I would go ATG and it put all the tension on my abductors and glutes. I’m going to go about 1-2 inches above parallel to keep tension on my quads and to avoid buttwink.
It doesn’t feel right and it puts a lot of stress on my lower back. I’ll post a form video soon but once I go past like 1/4 of the way down my entire structure just crunches and feels weird.
Today I tried Zercher Squats with some plates under my heels and I squatted onto the balls of my feet and it definitely hit my quads.
Workout: Friday Lower + 30 mins incline walking. I got 205lbs for 3x12 on RDL. It was pretty hard. I am going to retake it next session to make sure I am strong enough to need to increase the weight. Then I did leg curls and I must say my leg curls are getting a lot better and my hamstrings are bigger. My left hamstring has never really lit up before but it did today finally. Then I did Zercher Squats with some plates under my heels and I squatted onto the balls of my feet to emphasize quads and it felt good. I could only do the empty bar for 8 reps because if I went heavier I kept sitting back on my ass so I didn’t get any quads. I will progress this and hopefully it’ll grow my quads more than leg extensions without putting strain on my lower back.
And my 30 mins on the treadmill really flew by today. Maybe because I haven’t done it in a few sessions.
Steps: 9000
Thought Process: Nothing to really say today. Just gettin it done.
I gotta say its amazing seeing you go from basic full body for a couple sets to “I tried Zercher squats”. Seems like you are making progress and seeing results now. Hopefully you are finding more enjoyment in the gym now than you used to.
I figured I’d try Zerchers because I never really felt comfortable with normal back squats. And I’m trying to emphasize my quads and need to stay upright so having the bar in front of me makes that easier. And I figured it might have carry over to real life.
The whole time I’ve been trying to get squats to hit my quads, I kept squatting on my heels with my butt back, because that’s what I learned a long time ago. But I found this video → https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTaDcSPnc1g - and I tried it and it worked!
Basically, use enough heel elevation to where you can squat completely upright and don’t be afraid of going onto the front of your feet rather than your heels.
So now I have no buttwink or lower back fatigue and I can hit my quads with a squat. Very good!
My glutes are sore af from RDLs and my quads+upper spinal erectors are a little sore from the Zerchers just doing the bar. I can already see how this exercise is going to help me.
I wish I knew a faster way of bringing up my arms though. I feel like I can really tear into and progress my lower body and my lats but my arms are kind of chillin even though I go close to failure on preachers and tricep extensions. Maybe I should do more volume? idk. They are getting bigger and stronger but I wish it was a little faster.
But also keep in mind - they’re heading the right direction. I probably wouldn’t change anything. They’re smaller than your legs, relatively, so if you can actually notice they’re getting bigger and stronger, that’s actually pretty large improvement.
Justin Harris has postulated that we put on about 5 GRAMS of muscle per day if we’re doing everything right. You’re not going to see progress in your arms for a while simply because it takes a while for them to grow.
Yeah and my arms get lean before my chest and stomach so they look small until I lose the fat on my chest and stomach and then they’ll look normal. I have visible forearm veins and my left bicep vein is visible but I still have like 20-30 pounds of fat to lose. Just how I store my fat
