First of all, what the hell is an ermine?? (Scratch that – I saw the picture you posted, of course, but who’s ever even hear of an ermine)??!
Secondly, he looks harmless enough, I must say. Why not put out a dish of food for him and – well – keep him? Train him, pet him, make friends with him . . . maybe name him Ernie . . .
He looks cool!
But I must say, if I came home and saw one hanging out on my stairs I’d be like, “What the flying FUCK is going on??!”
If you do manage to snap some pics of Ernie, however . . . (AHEM)!!! (Clearing throat very, very loudly!
Heh Damici the city guy! My friend, these beasties are in the same group as Weasels, Ferrets, Badgers, Pole Cats etc. etc.
Not to worry MsM here as they do avoid humans whenever possible but when cornered they are mean little bastards with sharp fucking teath and they do not stop until they have bitten your todger off and swallowed it.
Please don’t be fooled by Ernies cute looks. He is to be treated with respect and very much not fucked with (unless you have tape).[/quote]
[quote]Damici wrote:
So as long as you have tape he’ll play with you? Tape is to Ernie as kryptonite is to Superman . . . ?
[/quote]
Ok here we go…
Small Furry Creature Fucking 101.
Any small furry creature when penetrated with a male “member” (without prior preperation) will split and nasty things will ooze out everywhere and not give a satisfying climax.
For the average animal, normal cellotape will be fine. These animals include badgers, Weasels and pole cats. Simply wrap the tape several times round their little bodies before insertion and a minimum of mess will occur.
Smaller rodents may need the more structurally strong duct tape or the like (Hampsters etc.)
For particularly small “members” please refer your questions to my colleague Football061 who will be happy to assist.
[quote]dianab wrote:
MsM, there’s gotta be a pest control company over the bridge willing to come get the little guy. It’s too cute, I’d keep it. Seriously, the meat in a cage sounds like your best bet.
Sounds like your first winter in the house has been fun so far!
db[/quote]
Never a dull moment, diana! lol
If this whole thing doesn’t work out over the next few days, I just may try that. Thanks for the suggestion. I hadn’t thought of trying out any companies from the Quebec side.
Aaaaand . . . I think someone’s alter ego just made an unexpected appearance.
You forget to mention the roofies, Rent!
[quote]Renton wrote:
Damici wrote:
So as long as you have tape he’ll play with you? Tape is to Ernie as kryptonite is to Superman . . . ?
Ok here we go…
Small Furry Creature Fucking 101.
Any small furry creature when penetrated with a male “member” (without prior preperation) will split and nasty things will ooze out everywhere and not give a satisfying climax.
For the average animal, normal cellotape will be fine. These animals include badgers, Weasels and pole cats. Simply wrap the tape several times round their little bodies before insertion and a minimum of mess will occur.
Smaller rodents may need the more structurally strong duct tape or the like (Hampsters etc.)
For particularly small “members” please refer your questions to my colleague Football061 who will be happy to assist.
First of all, what the hell is an ermine?? (Scratch that – I saw the picture you posted, of course, but who’s ever even hear of an ermine)??!
Secondly, he looks harmless enough, I must say. Why not put out a dish of food for him and – well – keep him? Train him, pet him, make friends with him . . . maybe name him Ernie . . .
He looks cool!
But I must say, if I came home and saw one hanging out on my stairs I’d be like, “What the flying FUCK is going on??!”
If you do manage to snap some pics of Ernie, however . . . (AHEM)!!! (Clearing throat very, very loudly![/quote]
We had one that ate the dear guts by our hunting shack. Cute little guy with blood all over it’s face haha.
[quote]Renton wrote:
Damici wrote:
So as long as you have tape he’ll play with you? Tape is to Ernie as kryptonite is to Superman . . . ?
Ok here we go…
Small Furry Creature Fucking 101.
Any small furry creature when penetrated with a male “member” (without prior preperation) will split and nasty things will ooze out everywhere and not give a satisfying climax.
For the average animal, normal cellotape will be fine. These animals include badgers, Weasels and pole cats. Simply wrap the tape several times round their little bodies before insertion and a minimum of mess will occur.
Smaller rodents may need the more structurally strong duct tape or the like (Hampsters etc.)
For particularly small “members” please refer your questions to my colleague Football061 who will be happy to assist.
Got called into work early today so no pics of the outside of the house yet.
Ernie doesn’t like shrimp. Tonight we will try chicken. I hope I find out what he likes soon or the trap may be harder than originally thought. He is always two steps ahead of me. I feel kind of like Elmer Fudd.
And no, I didn’t sleep well. Little bugger scooted across my bedroom floor aroud 2 am and scared me half to death.
[quote]MsM wrote:
Got called into work early today so no pics of the outside of the house yet.
Ernie doesn’t like shrimp. Tonight we will try chicken. I hope I find out what he likes soon or the trap may be harder than originally thought. He is always two steps ahead of me. I feel kind of like Elmer Fudd.
And no, I didn’t sleep well. Little bugger scooted across my bedroom floor aroud 2 am and scared me half to death.[/quote]
LMAO! So you had shrimp for breakfast? Waste not want not!
Did you handle the shrimp much? Ernie has an amazing sense of smell and even though shrimp are quite niffy he’ll probably detect human above that smell and avoid it.
You could try something like dog food. Should do the trick without costing the earth. If he’s not eating what you leave for him though it means he is out hunting and getting what he likes elsewhere - He’s just using your house for a nice place to sleep (and watch TV). This will indeed make trapping him somewhat harder. It does mean that blocking his entry route should also work though.
I suspect he’s just cold and wants to cuddle. You should let him in under the covers! Also, perhaps he couldn’t find the remote, so he got bored and just figured it was time for bed.
What’s the big deal? I think Ernie seems cool. Hey, it’s a better unexpected visitor than having the place be haunted!
[quote]MsM wrote:
And no, I didn’t sleep well. Little bugger scooted across my bedroom floor aroud 2 am and scared me half to death.[/quote]
I don’t think you need to take pictures of the house. The Hole is probably just 1.5 to 2 inches in diameter, maybe less. You’ll probably have to get on your knees and crawl around the foundation of your house to find it. There probably isn’t even a hole. He could have gotten in the vent for your dryer, slid in under a loose piece of aluminum siding, just about anything. Check to make sure everything is tight.
Why did he get named after Bert’s gay lover anyway?
How about Moochie McFly, Whitey Smalls, Colonel Silas J. Wigglesworth. Something with Gusto.
[quote]Uncle Gabby wrote:
I don’t think you need to take pictures of the house. The Hole is probably just 1.5 to 2 inches in diameter, maybe less. You’ll probably have to get on your knees and crawl around the foundation of your house to find it. There probably isn’t even a hole. He could have gotten in the vent for your dryer, slid in under a loose piece of aluminum siding, just about anything. Check to make sure everything is tight.
Why did he get named after Bert’s gay lover anyway?
How about Moochie McFly, Whitey Smalls, Colonel Silas J. Wigglesworth. Something with Gusto.
[/quote]
Okay, no pics.
You’re probably right though.
No idea how he got named that. Bert and Ernie are not gay. They weren’t gay when I was growing up and I refuse to believe they are now. You can’t convince me they pushed their beds together.
[quote]Uncle Gabby wrote:
I don’t think you need to take pictures of the house. The Hole is probably just 1.5 to 2 inches in diameter, maybe less. You’ll probably have to get on your knees and crawl around the foundation of your house to find it. There probably isn’t even a hole. He could have gotten in the vent for your dryer, slid in under a loose piece of aluminum siding, just about anything. Check to make sure everything is tight.
Why did he get named after Bert’s gay lover anyway?
How about Moochie McFly, Whitey Smalls, Colonel Silas J. Wigglesworth. Something with Gusto.
[/quote]
Okay, I think you’re right about the dryer Uncle Gabby. lol So, I’m in the bathroom washing my face about 15 minutes ago. The bathroom is right beside the laundry room. I happened to see something behind me in the mirror. I turned around and there he was! No kidding. Right behind me on the floor. I’m not sure who was more startled. He started running around frantically.
Didn’t know what to do so I screamed and closed the door. lol I went to get a waste basket and I could see his little claws coming out from underneath the door. I opened the door and went for it…he got away…after a good chase though. To where, I’m not sure. I just know he ran behind the dryer.
Those little guys are fast!!! He was petrified though. I doubt I’ll see him again tonight.
[quote]MsM wrote:
Okay, I think you’re right about the dryer Uncle Gabby. lol So, I’m in the bathroom washing my face about 15 minutes ago. The bathroom is right beside the laundry room. I happened to see something behind me in the mirror. I turned around and there he was! No kidding. Right behind me on the floor. I’m not sure who was more startled. He started running around frantically.
[/quote]
There’s probably a screen in there that’s loose or broken. I’d repair the screen immediatly, so he doesn’t invite in Mrs. Smalls, and the entire Smalls family in.
