I HATE My Ethnicitiy - What's Wrong with Me?

Off Topic
61

[quote]Raza ka Maza wrote:
FightinIrish26 wrote:
You’re a man without a country.

Are you being serious? Because this seems to be the mindset that many white brits seem to have: “if hes not white, he’s not British”.

I like to think I am though since I was born and raised here, am proud to call myself British and love the culture and it really saddens me when I read/hear comments like that.

It’s like i’ll never fit in in india and although I want to, for some like the irish guy I’ll never be truly british either. I mean if the girl I liked who knows me and likes me can’t accept me as a partner because of my background, then what chance do I have?[/quote]

This girl thing, happens to every guy who falls for girls. This probably won’t be the last time. You don’t ever chase someone who does not want you! Think about it. You will like people who don’t like you, it happens, could be your heritage, could be your smell, could be your attitudes.

I’d venture to say you were so busy trying to please her that you were annoying. Be yourself. Forget all the other bullshit, FORGE YOUR OWN TRAIL!

62

Indians are biologically similar to whites- I think they’re actually considered caucasion.

63

[quote]Raza ka Maza wrote:
I’m a 20 y/o British male and I absolutely hate being indian. From a young age i’ve grown up in predominantly white communities, until the age of 9 I grew up in a town where I was the only non-white kid in school.

Now you’re probably thinking it’s because of racial incidents in the past, but I have honestly experienced very little racism at all.

I don’t know why but I hate indian culture, I will try to avoid indian food as much as possible, at home I get angry if my parents speak to me in anything other than english - I wish I could unlearn my understanding of hindi and punjabi. And my social life has really suffered due to this as well, throughout school and even now I never call any friends round to my house because my dad is very religious and I don’t want my friend seeing all the hindu picture or see them wearing traiditional clothing or hear them speaking a foreign language. So I always went to their houses or arrange to meet outside.

In uni virtually all of my firends are white, there were some asian folk who were friendly but I just didn’t want anyhting to do with them when they startd talking about bhangra nights etc.

But I myself am very british at heart, i’ve had one gf in the past who was indian, but it ended very quickly, because we were very different people, she was into bollywood and Star TV etc and didn’t drink while I had a more mainstream lifestyle, so even though we were the same ethnicity (both punjabi) there was a culture clash.

I think one of the main reasons I think this was is because in college there was this one girl who I can honestly say I had fallen in love, she was a friend of a friend and we got to know each other well, the more I got to know her the more I had fallen in love with her, she was very British, and as much as I tried, she just didn’t seem interested in me, and I can almost guarantee its because i’m indian, she wasn’t a bigot or a xenophobic or anything since we were quite good friends, but she didn’t consider me to be ‘bf material’ because of this.

Do you think that could be the reason why I think this way?
I just want to be Caucasian British but my backgorund won’t let me be.[/quote]

Are you serious? Alright, Ill be honest, I know to an extent how you feel. I’m Indian too, with a somewhat traditional household. Im 23, and have gotten waaay over it. Its really about self confidence, and what everyone else has been saying, they are right. Stop blaming your parents, and how is it even a negative factor? Learn to embrace that shit.

Honestly, if you delve into the Indian culture, Im sure you’ll find something that will just fascinate you. Man, we have so much history behind our culture, its unique in so many different ways. I’m hairy, but Im damn proud of it now. I have a big nose, but I dont care, dont even draw attention to it. One thing I learned is that people will treat you the way you treat yourself.

Now, in terms of the girl, I had a very similar situation. Was friends with a girl, and fell for her. She was asian, and I thought it was the same reason, because of my Indian heritage. But the problem was, that she was a friend first. The other guy who said that women make the decision of whether or not they are attracted to another person in 15 seconds is right. Its very hard to get out of that friend zone and into the “guy id like to fuck” zone.

Trust me, its very rare. So I tell you this, boost up your confidence, and things will be alright. I have confidence issues everyday that Im still working on, its always a work in progress.

One more thing, search for “Russell Peters” on youtube. He’s a Canadian-born Indian comedian that just makes fun of all races, namely Indians. But he just brings out the fun and the humor in it, and its fantastic. I use that to my advantage when talking to girls. Its an awesome ice-breaker, they love that shit.

64

[quote]loppar wrote:
After all, your ancestors stopped Alexander the Great while ancient Britons were prancing around half-naked :)[/quote]

So, you are comparing stopping a man with the ghey, and people who were having sex with their women. I’d said Indian=Fail

To the original poster, it’s not because your Indian. It’s because you let yourself fall into the friend zone. FAIL

Stop hating yourself, my ancestors are Irish/Scott, were considered property of the British Royal Family just like the Indians. I’ve met a few of my relatives that wanted to be British, then realized the only way to be accepted by another group is by being exactly like them. If your Indian, you might be from a English society, but you are still Indian. Just like I’m still Irish. Vote for the IRA.

65

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
loppar wrote:
After all, your ancestors stopped Alexander the Great while ancient Britons were prancing around half-naked :slight_smile:

So, you are comparing stopping a man with the ghey, and people who were having sex with their women. I’d said Indian=Fail

To the original poster, it’s not because your Indian. It’s because you let yourself fall into the friend zone. FAIL

Stop hating yourself, my ancestors are Irish/Scott, were considered property of the British Royal Family just like the Indians. I’ve met a few of my relatives that wanted to be British, then realized the only way to be accepted by another group is by being exactly like them. If your Indian, you might be from a English society, but you are still Indian. Just like I’m still Irish. Vote for the IRA.[/quote]

Really. Are you an Irish citizen?

66

[quote]Stength4life wrote:
durka durka[/quote]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

67

[quote]belligerent wrote:
Indians are biologically similar to whites- I think they’re actually considered caucasion.[/quote]

I find that offensive. I’m no cracka.

68

You are who you are for a reason. You need to find out why you are indian and accept your path on earth.

69

OP, mainly the problem exists in your head. You can give a fuck or don’t give a fuck about your ethnicity in your love life. You choose to give a fuck and make a problem out of it.

In the end you’ll have to accept your ethnicity and difference in culture, if you want to have a good self image, self esteem, etc. In the end try not to give a fuck.

70

Looks like we have a really severe case of ‘coconut’ on our hands here.

Abhe chutiya, kyun apni maa baap ki besati kar raha hain? Goro ke liye tum indian ho, aur indian hi rahoge. Lehkin hum kisi se kum nahin hain!

Stop hating yourself man, it’s sad and pathetic. There is nothing wrong with any ethnicity, there are people who suck and peole who don’t in every country. Accept that your problems are because of your OWN indequecies as an individual and NOT because of your ethnicity or because your parents don’t speak english well or whatever other BS reason you find.

71

Hey buddy, it could be worse. You could be half native american Indian / half south Asian Indian. Man, that would be confusing.

Hope things work out for you.

72

Allow me to beat the dead horse, too. Wait, I’ll try to revive it. Dude, OP, you should totally keep hating yourself and your parents culture. That girl definitely didn’t like you cuz you’re an Indian. Try as hard as you can to distance yourself from your Indian side and be a white British guy, that will really work out for you. Also, don’t listen to any of these people, they have no idea what they are talking about.

High fives to Kaizen for recommending Russell Peters (he’s hilarious) and to Strength4life for the Team America reference that had nothing to do at all with this thread (he’s Indian, not Arab, use your acting skills).

Oh, and before I forget, I resemble that remark, Makavali

73

Odds are that some of the people you hang out with have some negative views of Indians (ie, are racist). These people may project that shit in a subtle way that gets under your radar b/c you think of them as friends and so your defences are down. Check your mates, see if they really are your mates. I’m Indian and I hate some of the crap in my culture, bollywood, bhangra etc. My parents tried to raise me to appreciate my culture by pushing this bullshit on me so I rebelled for a while by wholly embracing Canadian culture (although I never hated my ethnicity).

There is a lot more to being British, American, or Indian than the pop culture nonsense that most people consider to be important parts of culture. I find that parents usually only transmit the shallow aspects of a culture to their youth, b/c they themselves lack any deep knowledge. You could dig deep into your religious and ethnice background, there are many great and interesting things there.

Also, no offence but don’t make excuses by blaming culture/race for when you don’t get things you don’t want. Being Indian could have saved you from maybe wasting away in a long term relationship with a racist man, that’s a big plus.

74

[quote]TakeDamage wrote:
this is embarassing to say, but being 2nd generation hispanic from a private school i know PLENTY of girls that will not go out with a black/indian dude, just because of the color of there skin.

this is awful to type, but it happens, regardless these types of girls are retarded and offer very little.[/quote]

Why is it such a terrible thing to exculde certain races when looking for a relationship? Are you just as upset about Jews marrying Jews to keep and preserve thier heritage? Or are you just upset at the white girls who won’t give you the time of day?

75

[quote]counterfeitsoda wrote:
asusvenus wrote:
I myself take pride of being part danish part african(Tanzania)… You know, be a little different?

I don’t understand the OPs logic, but I never understood being “proud” of my ethnicity either. What exactly is there to be proud about? I’m proud about my own accomplishments, but I just can’t see being proud to be decendent from a bunch of people in other countries that I never knew, who had/have a completely different way of living than I do. [/quote]

x2 rip george carlin

76

Pop quiz guys! Is it better being indian of being white? Herein lies the answer to your woes as consensus on this forum will tell you why only suicide is your only option left.

77

[quote]DickBag wrote:
Makavali wrote:
belligerent wrote:
Indians are biologically similar to whites- I think they’re actually considered caucasion.

I find that offensive. I’m no cracka.

fart cat said you are.[/quote]

i accept me for me

luv u

78

[quote]counterfeitsoda wrote:
asusvenus wrote:
I myself take pride of being part danish part african(Tanzania)… You know, be a little different?

I don’t understand the OPs logic, but I never understood being “proud” of my ethnicity either. What exactly is there to be proud about? I’m proud about my own accomplishments, but I just can’t see being proud to be decendent from a bunch of people in other countries that I never knew, who had/have a completely different way of living than I do. [/quote]

Agree. There’s no need to be proud/ashamed about something that is not under our power/control.

OP, you feel british at heart? So be it! Heck! You grew up in this country! What did you expect?

79

[quote]trite wrote:

Moreover it should be noted, that Chicken Tikka Masala has become a British national dish whereas it is originally Indian. [/quote]

Hmm. I’m not sure calling it a national dish is accurate and AFAIK it was actually invented in Britain rather than India.

80

[quote]Raza ka Maza wrote:
I’m a 20 y/o British male and I absolutely hate being indian. From a young age i’ve grown up in predominantly white communities, until the age of 9 I grew up in a town where I was the only non-white kid in school.

Now you’re probably thinking it’s because of racial incidents in the past, but I have honestly experienced very little racism at all.

I don’t know why but I hate indian culture, I will try to avoid indian food as much as possible, at home I get angry if my parents speak to me in anything other than english - I wish I could unlearn my understanding of hindi and punjabi. And my social life has really suffered due to this as well, throughout school and even now I never call any friends round to my house because my dad is very religious and I don’t want my friend seeing all the hindu picture or see them wearing traiditional clothing or hear them speaking a foreign language. So I always went to their houses or arrange to meet outside.

In uni virtually all of my firends are white, there were some asian folk who were friendly but I just didn’t want anyhting to do with them when they startd talking about bhangra nights etc.

But I myself am very british at heart, i’ve had one gf in the past who was indian, but it ended very quickly, because we were very different people, she was into bollywood and Star TV etc and didn’t drink while I had a more mainstream lifestyle, so even though we were the same ethnicity (both punjabi) there was a culture clash.

I think one of the main reasons I think this was is because in college there was this one girl who I can honestly say I had fallen in love, she was a friend of a friend and we got to know each other well, the more I got to know her the more I had fallen in love with her, she was very British, and as much as I tried, she just didn’t seem interested in me, and I can almost guarantee its because i’m indian, she wasn’t a bigot or a xenophobic or anything since we were quite good friends, but she didn’t consider me to be ‘bf material’ because of this.

Do you think that could be the reason why I think this way?
I just want to be Caucasian British but my backgorund won’t let me be.[/quote]

You are the epitome of the ultra, super, unadulterated FAIL!!!
That girl doesn’t want you because you don’t have any confidence. Also, the fact that you SUCK AT LIFE probably does not help either.