[quote]malonetd wrote:
I wish I had an unlimited supply of Fuity Pebbles.[/quote]
Granted. You are kidnapped by terrorists who decide to brainwash you by force feeding you fruity pebbles. Your weight baloons to over 400 lbs. and you become the largest suicide bomber in history.
[quote]derek wrote:
malonetd wrote:
I wish I had an unlimited supply of Fuity Pebbles.
Greanted. But the first bite sends you back into the stone age and you have to wear animal skins and stop you car with your feet.
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
[/quote]
Granted, but the other competitors become extremely jealous. After the show, they all tie you down and inject synthol into your nuts.
I wish super hero movies didn’t suck.
[quote]derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
[/quote]
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
[quote]chewie wrote:
derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
[/quote]
Granted, but the machine will only take you to Pearl Harbor, December 7, 1941. Good luck!
[quote]chewie wrote:
derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
[/quote]
granted, congratulations on your brand new wristwatch.
I wish I could come up with a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
[quote]m0dd3r wrote:
chewie wrote:
derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
granted, congratulations on your brand new wristwatch.
I wish I could come up with a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
[/quote]
Granted, but for every person you stab you will vomit up a 1 lb of shit.
[quote]m0dd3r wrote:
granted, congratulations on your brand new wristwatch.
I wish I could come up with a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
[/quote]
You accidently test this new face stabber invention on yourself, so the first message sent to your assistant is “Mr. Watson, come here! I’ve stabbed my own face.” An eerie parallel to Alexander Graham Bell’s first telephone message (when he’d spilt acid). You die painfully of an infected nasty face wound.
I wish I could stop and restart time whenever I liked, just as that girl on the tv show.
[quote]m0dd3r wrote:
chewie wrote:
derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
granted, congratulations on your brand new wristwatch.
I wish I could come up with a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
[/quote]
Granted, but it’s still murder, and you get convicted. Meet your new cellmate, Bubba.
I wish I hadnt said yes when my friend at duke invited me to the party his team was having last march
[quote]KBCThird wrote:
m0dd3r wrote:
chewie wrote:
derek wrote:
I wish I could compete (and win) drug-free in the WSM.
Granted. Since you didn’t specify the exact meaning of WSM it was assumed that it meant World’s Smallest Man and you are shrunk to a staggering 18 inches tall.
I wish i had a time machine.
granted, congratulations on your brand new wristwatch.
I wish I could come up with a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
Granted, but it’s still murder, and you get convicted. Meet your new cellmate, Bubba.
I wish I hadnt said yes when my friend at duke invited me to the party his team was having last march[/quote]
Granted, you never went to the party and went to a UMCP campus party and impregnated a chick. Now she’s suing you for child-support.
I wish I won 8 straight Tour De France races.
[quote]KingCLee33 wrote:
I wish I won 8 straight Tour De France races.[/quote]
Granted, AND you have both your testicles too! Along with a third, that requires to be drained daily through a tube into a small bag next to your bed.
[quote]KingCLee33 wrote:
I wish I won 8 straight Tour De France races.[/quote]
Granted.
But since you don’t have a pity story like Lance Armstrong, you get nothing and endorsements and end up pawning your trophies and working minimum wage cleaning out toilets while people ask you “Hey, weren’t you that guy who won 8 Tour De Frances?” and die of shame. Enjoy.
I wish I made a wish and then had it flipped around on me.
[quote]KingCLee33 wrote:
I wish I won 8 straight Tour De France races.[/quote]
Granted. Now becuase of all the time in the saddle, another tumor has formed and you loose your other nut, and thee inches of your penis. Also your ex-superstar girlfriend comes out publically saying shes in a lesbian relationship with your ex-wife.
I wish I did not have to go “personal growth” counseling tomorrow.
[quote]DtotheG wrote:
But since you don’t have a pity story like Lance Armstrong, you get nothing and endorsements and end up pawning your trophies and working minimum wage cleaning out toilets while people ask you “Hey, weren’t you that guy who won 8 Tour De Frances?” and die of shame. Enjoy.
I wish I made a wish and then had it flipped around on me.[/quote]
You never would have imagined that your wish would turn out exactly as you imagined, but it did. And that was how your wish was flipped.
I wish my name was Flip Wisherson, and everyone thought it was cool and not gay.
[quote]Kailash wrote:
DtotheG wrote:
But since you don’t have a pity story like Lance Armstrong, you get nothing and endorsements and end up pawning your trophies and working minimum wage cleaning out toilets while people ask you “Hey, weren’t you that guy who won 8 Tour De Frances?” and die of shame. Enjoy.
I wish I made a wish and then had it flipped around on me.
You never would have imagined that your wish would turn out exactly as you imagined, but it did. And that was how your wish was flipped.
I wish my name was Flip Wisherson, and everyone thought it was cool and not gay.[/quote]
Granted, but only because “everyone,” is you. You are the only human alive.
I wish for nobody to post after me.
[quote]grew7 wrote:
I wish for nobody to post after me.[/quote]
Granted.
I wish I could live with my ancestors in our ancient celtic clan on the cliffs of donegal.
[quote]X-Factor wrote:
Granted.
I wish I could live with my ancestors in our ancient celtic clan on the cliffs of donegal.[/quote]
You do live with them. But unfortunately, it’s as yourself, and not as the you that would have been you had you lived with them from birth. So you’re totally clueless on how to survive, and are devoured by a pack of rabid squirrels while still alive.
I wish everything I said rhymed, without even taking the time or use of my mind.
[quote]Kailash wrote:
I wish everything I said rhymed, without even taking the time or use of my mind.[/quote]
Granted. Unfortunately almost everything you say has a curse word that rhymes with it. People soon consider you a foul mouthed pervert and you’re soon jobless and homeless.
“Hey there man, can you spare a buck, don’t look at me and act like you don’t give a f—.”
I wish I could close the COC #4.
[quote]lawsonsamuels wrote:
I wish I could close the COC #4.[/quote]
Granted, but it’s only with the vagina you just grew. And nobody wants to put anything in a hole that can crush like that. So you die an alone and sexually unfilled man-woman.
I wish the guy playing Superman wasn’t such a girly-man.
[quote]lawsonsamuels wrote:
I wish I could close the COC #4.[/quote]
Granted. In an attempt to show your skills and close it too close to your testicles and lose both.
I wish I could do the iron cross.
[quote]chewie wrote:
lawsonsamuels wrote:
I wish I could do the iron cross.
[/quote]
Granted–but you are missing both your legs so your efforts for such strength is in vain because none are impressed.
I wish for the ability to travel in time without any repercussions to the present or future.