I feel like its the perfect insult if one were hypothetically confronting / discussing a pair of unsavoury people
“oo 2 for 1 at the build-a-bitch today”
I feel like its the perfect insult if one were hypothetically confronting / discussing a pair of unsavoury people
“oo 2 for 1 at the build-a-bitch today”
Ha! ![]()
Not to toot my own horn, but I will say I conjured up a fairly multi-use insult
I hear awesome insults and expressions all the time (mostly from guys in the field), but my memory is dogshit so most of them float away on the breeze. These are a few that were uttered in office meetings, and I had the presence of mind to write them down:
dumber than a bag of hammers
he wouldn’t know how to pour piss out of a boot if I put directions on the heel
fuck me to tears running backwards
he doesn’t know shit from apple butter
like trying to eat jello with chopsticks
like comparing apples to speed boats
flow ‘em like a scalded dog (opening wells up so they flow as much as possible)
belched up the beach (talking about the amount of water a well was producing)
runnin’ like a raped ape (how a flash gas compressor was operating after it was repaired)
Those last 3 are very oilfield-specific so I provided a little context. All are from the production superintendent I used to work with in the Marcellus. He’s a colorful dude. There are dozens more that I didn’t get a chance to write down.
You’d be surprised how many of my older relatives actually try this ![]()
“Goes like a raped ape” is one my uncle uses to describe fast cars.
“God damn living proof that a fetus can dodge a coat hanger for 9 months”–Drill Sergeant Walker
I’ve always enjoyed “jack assery” to describe situations or behavior.
“I could give two shits” or “zero shits” has been my go to when describing how much l care about whatever jack assery is going on.
This has everything an insult needs, I think.
I am fairly tolerant of people who aggravate me, so I don’t often find myself throwing insults at them. But my two favorite are:
Mongoloid, divvy.
Any of these Yosamite Sam insults
:
Vigorous scrubbing & rubbing every day keeps the cheese away
Are those your legs, or are you riding a chicken?
It’s not exactly unconventional but you don’t hear the insult scumbag much anymore.
You’re probably of the opinion that scumbag is a terrible insult and I would have agreed with you not so long ago.
Then I was talking to some old guy and he told me that originally scumbag was a reference to a used, tied up and discarded condom.
Ouch