I have seventeen year old twins. They’re great kids, boy and girl . They might have been swatted on the butt seven times each by me, last time around age seven.
And the reason for every incidence was direct defiance. Not s mistake . Not spilling milk, but deliberate Fu I’m fling what I please. I’m guessing they talked to me in a cocky tone 2-3 times in my life. The last time my son was 11 and we were at a Penn State game tailgate . He mouthed off in that way s kid does to push the limits but trying to get away with it
I grabbed him by his t shirt and picked him up by one hand ( he was 85 lbs only) and told him with a smile on my face that he better stop because he’s pissing me off. He chuckled and said he was sorry and the day went on. No biggie.
[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
[quote]Rodimus Black wrote:
If we are debating spankings on the merits of the video, then it’s a moot point, as the dad is a fucking tool, and should have no access to the child. You don’t record shit like that. And you DAMN sure don’t post it to fucking Youtube!!!
Now, as far as spanking kids goes, I’m a believer in the saying, “there is a time and place for such things.” I didn’t get beat for every wrong thing I did as a child. When I did something egregiously wrong, I got the belt/shoe/wooden spoon/toy track/hand. I despised the hand the most, as my mother is shockingly heavy-handed! lol. But, I learned two things from my spankings. Either I didn’t do the bad thing again, or I got really good at not getting caught. I will raise my kids in the same manner, only, I will show them more love than my mother or father ever showed me (not much from the mother, NONE from the father.)
As for the swearing…what-the-fuck-ever. It’s going to happen. We are human. We get emotional. One can only try to temper the use.[/quote]
This is a reasonable response. And yes, there is a time and place. As the full time single parent of a 5 year old, my parenting is evolving, even though I have two older boys (but I was “part time” weekend dad then - big difference). I decided that in this house, that a quick swat or two on the behind is in order for DEFIANCE.
Meaning, I have told him something, maybe more than once, and he is just defying me. Defiance is an offense I cannot tolerate and will not negotiate. Other than expecting him to do something when told, defiance as potential safety issues attached to it. So I agree with you.
And I know it’s old school to have gotten hit with objects. I’m not even really too troubled by that - it’s just the way it was. But we, as parents, as society, evolve. I can name lots of things that were done 40 years ago that aren’t okay now. Think of our evolution as a society from the environment, to woman’s rights, to civil rights, etc. and so forth. I don’t really believe you’re going to pick up the Hot Wheels track and whoop your child when the time comes.
As for the love part, that’s key.
As for swearing. Fuck lol I swear. I try not to. I swore around my older boys, but they understood that they were not permitted to swear. I figured being true, rather than a hypocrite was the way to go. It worked. I never got a call from school reporting “Vinnie called me a motherfucker”. But he was talking to that kid that way I’d talk to a grown ass man that owed me money. Seriously. “Oh, I loaned you money, we had an arrangement, you aint payin me but your ass here playing fucking poker with MY money right? So it’s just fuck me right?”. He’s talking to a little boy, not some dude on the street. But yes, we are human, children will check your patience…again and again and again. They will make you have moments that are NOT your best. But ya know what? This dude was in COMPLETE control, just like that Hot Sauce Mom. And that troubles me.
It’s methodical. It’s practiced. It’s ROUTINE. The kid KMOWS THE SCRIPT…and that shit aint cool and it’s not okay. This is not a “man” that lost his cool. [/quote]
