[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.[/quote]
Fuck.
Is his health ok, otherwise?
Am I a retard for asking these questions?
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.[/quote]
Fuck.
Is his health ok, otherwise?
Am I a retard for asking these questions?[/quote]
No, it’s fine. It’s a bit of a shock here. Last time I saw him was 2-3 years ago, when my stepmother in law was being treated for breast cancer. Old bastard shaved his head along with everyone else in solidarity.
This is the guy who you can see in my formal wedding pics in church, flipping the bird to the camera. At the reception that night, he took off his arm sling (hurt it in a fall), and was dancing around with all the young women with his cane between his legs like a big ol’ penis.
He parachuted into France before Normandy and spent time at Stalag 17.
He’s diabetic, and near 90. Apparently he decided to stop eating two weeks ago.
We are leaving for NY on Wednesday. Hubby doesn’t know if he should cancel the trip and go to TN to see this grandpa, or still go to NY. Grandpa says he doesn’t want anyone coming to see him in this state. What would you do?
Tough call.
Wouldn’t want to have to make that decision right now. Sorry PMPM
[quote]imhungry wrote:
Balls.[/quote]
Two please.
EDIT: Didn’t mean to interupt a serious moment.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.[/quote]
Fuck.
Is his health ok, otherwise?
Am I a retard for asking these questions?[/quote]
No, it’s fine. It’s a bit of a shock here. Last time I saw him was 2-3 years ago, when my stepmother in law was being treated for breast cancer. Old bastard shaved his head along with everyone else in solidarity.
This is the guy who you can see in my formal wedding pics in church, flipping the bird to the camera. At the reception that night, he took off his arm sling (hurt it in a fall), and was dancing around with all the young women with his cane between his legs like a big ol’ penis.
He parachuted into France before Normandy and spent time at Stalag 17.
He’s diabetic, and near 90. Apparently he decided to stop eating two weeks ago.
We are leaving for NY on Wednesday. Hubby doesn’t know if he should cancel the trip and go to TN to see this grandpa, or still go to NY. Grandpa says he doesn’t want anyone coming to see him in this state. What would you do?[/quote]
You know how you deal with stubborn people…be stubborn. I’d go visit him, even if just to piss him off. Make him eat food and bring him to NY…or not because who would want to go to NY anyway.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.[/quote]
Fuck.
Is his health ok, otherwise?
Am I a retard for asking these questions?[/quote]
No, it’s fine. It’s a bit of a shock here. Last time I saw him was 2-3 years ago, when my stepmother in law was being treated for breast cancer. Old bastard shaved his head along with everyone else in solidarity.
This is the guy who you can see in my formal wedding pics in church, flipping the bird to the camera. At the reception that night, he took off his arm sling (hurt it in a fall), and was dancing around with all the young women with his cane between his legs like a big ol’ penis.
He parachuted into France before Normandy and spent time at Stalag 17.
He’s diabetic, and near 90. Apparently he decided to stop eating two weeks ago.
We are leaving for NY on Wednesday. Hubby doesn’t know if he should cancel the trip and go to TN to see this grandpa, or still go to NY. Grandpa says he doesn’t want anyone coming to see him in this state. What would you do?[/quote]
Sounds like we are in the same boat. Besides all the usual drama of life, I found out this weekend that BND is sick. Cancer sick. I don’t want to talk much about it because he is a private person but I think I’ll go nuts if I keep quiet.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]imhungry wrote:
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Hubby’s got four grandparents. One has decided to decline food and medical treatment (he is diabetic). Merry Christmas.[/quote]
Why? Just being stubborn?[/quote]
He wants to die.[/quote]
Fuck.
Is his health ok, otherwise?
Am I a retard for asking these questions?[/quote]
No, it’s fine. It’s a bit of a shock here. Last time I saw him was 2-3 years ago, when my stepmother in law was being treated for breast cancer. Old bastard shaved his head along with everyone else in solidarity.
This is the guy who you can see in my formal wedding pics in church, flipping the bird to the camera. At the reception that night, he took off his arm sling (hurt it in a fall), and was dancing around with all the young women with his cane between his legs like a big ol’ penis.
He parachuted into France before Normandy and spent time at Stalag 17.
He’s diabetic, and near 90. Apparently he decided to stop eating two weeks ago.
We are leaving for NY on Wednesday. Hubby doesn’t know if he should cancel the trip and go to TN to see this grandpa, or still go to NY. Grandpa says he doesn’t want anyone coming to see him in this state. What would you do?[/quote]
Well, first off, i’d be bent that he put everyone in a no-win situation. Especially, around the holidays.
I totally understand that it’s his life, but it’s an absolutely selfish thing to do to his wife and family. No matter what you guys decide to do, there’s going to be some (or a lot) of quilt involved and that’s just not fair to anyone.
What it would come down to, is what your husbands’ grandmother would want and if the worst happens, can you live with it? Either way, you would most likely have regrets on whatever you guys decide.
I feel REALLY bad about this and I honestly wish there was something I could do, PMPM.
Heh, totally inappropriate but you know me.
Grandma and grandpa have been married over 60 years. They separated about a year ago, and have been going back and forth about living together or not. They’re like, calling the cops on one another for spousal abuse. Totally hilarious, in a totally not funny way.
If we’re looking at what grandma wants, she’d probably shoot him herself.
Yeah, I think he is being selfish, but I understand where he is coming from, too.
Toots - hugs I am so sorry to hear about BND. Hope things work out well.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Heh, totally inappropriate but you know me.
Grandma and grandpa have been married over 60 years. They separated about a year ago, and have been going back and forth about living together or not. They’re like, calling the cops on one another for spousal abuse. Totally hilarious, in a totally not funny way.
If we’re looking at what grandma wants, she’d probably shoot him herself.
Yeah, I think he is being selfish, but I understand where he is coming from, too.
Toots - hugs I am so sorry to hear about BND. Hope things work out well.[/quote]
“inappropriate”? What, my first comment?
Damn, what a character he must be. I mean that in the nicest possible way… I hope I have half of his spunkiness when i’m anywhere near his age.
How’s your husband handling this?
Let’s look at it from his point of view. He’s lived a very long life. A very full life. He’s in pain/misery. He just wants to move on. If he specifically said he didn’t want people trooping over there to see him, I believe that he means it. Perhaps he’d like peoples’ last memories to be of him in better times? Ala cane penis dancing with all the young ladies after flipping off the camera (too funny actually). Perhaps he knows people are going to stand around his bed and try to force him to eat. It feels selfish but maybe people trying to impose their own views on him are being selfish too? It’s a no win. Can your hubby call and tell him he wants to honor his wish not to come that way and see how G-pa responds? hugs
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Heh, totally inappropriate but you know me.
Grandma and grandpa have been married over 60 years. They separated about a year ago, and have been going back and forth about living together or not. They’re like, calling the cops on one another for spousal abuse. Totally hilarious, in a totally not funny way.
If we’re looking at what grandma wants, she’d probably shoot him herself.
Yeah, I think he is being selfish, but I understand where he is coming from, too.
Toots - hugs I am so sorry to hear about BND. Hope things work out well.[/quote]
Thanks. hugs back
I’m always crushed when I hear about older couples breaking up. You would think that they got through the hardest part already. I think people should be able to do what they want but they need to be considerate of their family. They are the ones who go on living after.
[quote]attydeb2005 wrote:
Let’s look at it from his point of view. He’s lived a very long life. A very full life. He’s in pain/misery. He just wants to move on. If he specifically said he didn’t want people trooping over there to see him, I believe that he means it. Perhaps he’d like peoples’ last memories to be of him in better times? Ala cane penis dancing with all the young ladies after flipping off the camera (too funny actually). Perhaps he knows people are going to stand around his bed and try to force him to eat. It feels selfish but maybe people trying to impose their own views on him are being selfish too? It’s a no win. Can your hubby call and tell him he wants to honor his wish not to come that way and see how G-pa responds? hugs[/quote]
Yeah, I think you’re right about this, Deb. It’s a better alternative to what I was thinking.
^ End of life issues are always difficult, I say go see him tell him you love him. Do not force your own feelings on him just see him and then leave him alone. If that is to much of an expense then phone call saying the same. PMPM I will pray for you and your husband
badass!
[quote]tootles27 wrote:
badass![/quote]
lol
man that’s a tough one PMPM.
evenin folks.
Toots and PMPM, I’m sorry about your situations! I honestly wish there was something I (or IH and I) could do. It’s tough not to want to see someone who doesn’t want to be seen. It makes you want to seem them that much more, I think. I hope he does relent and let everyone say their last goodbyes.