Dealing w/ a Stalking Ex-Boyfriend

Off Topic
25

[quote]Dissonance wrote:
Oh damn, I fell for it.

Let me give it a try?

Alright,
So there I was right? Just minding my own business when some asshole face steps up to me and gets all in my grill. I’m like, “Look bro, back up off me.” He’s like, “I’ll punch you in the BACK OF YOUR FACE.”

Shit, I mean, who wants to get punched in the back of the face? That’s the worst part of the face to get punched. I set my Zima down and that’s when shit got crucial. He whistles for his boyz, and they surround me while cracking their knuckles. They were all smoking pcp and some looked strapped.

Not to be a punk, I say, “Want to see a magic trick?” A few of them scoffed at me, obviously unimpressed. I reached in to my Members Only jacket pocket and produced a deck of cards. The leader of these ruffians started sweating as I began shuffing.

“Take a card, motherfucker” I said in a low, gutteral voice. Hands trembling, the gangbanger pulled a card from the middle of the deck. “Ten of clubs, bitch!”

The horror on his face will forever burn in my memory. A few gangstas in his crew started backpeddling, but there was nowhere to run.

I yanked out the gats and starting blasting. Bodies fell like rain in Seattle. Screams of mercy went ignored. I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone really, just scare them a bit. Brain matter and intestines littered the scene, and I even paused to notice my godly biceps in the mirror as the steel recoiled again, and again, and again.

After the storm subsided and the thunder stopped, I picked my Zima back up and dropped a watermelon Jolly Rancher in that bitch and took a nice long hard sip. As I surveyed the joint HOPING some more punk ass bitches needed to be put in check, I remembered it was Friday night, and Menace II Society was on TBS.

I broke up out of there and hopped in my 1992 Honda Civic. With the money I save on insurance, I got some spinnas and some hydraulics yo. I flipped some and hopped on out of that parking lot feeling like a real pimp.

My question is, do you guys think it’s cooler to hold your gats sideways while spitting fire, or upside down? Looking back, I probably should have switched it up a bit. Oh well, there’s always next weekend.[/quote]

LOL. The Zima / Jolly Rancher part was a nice touch.

26

[quote]Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.[/quote]

That’s what I’m talkin’ 'bout!

Wanna be my biatch??

27

[quote]Neuromancer wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

That’s what I’m talkin’ 'bout!

Wanna be my biatch??[/quote]

“Who’s the Biatch now!!”

28

[quote]Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.[/quote]

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?

29

Hug it out…

30

[quote]PRCalDude wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?[/quote]

No.

31

[quote]PRCalDude wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?[/quote]

Yes. Whenever the old boyfriend’s around, clip should piss on her to mark his territory and show his dominance.

32

[quote]imhungry wrote:
PRCalDude wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?

Yes. Whenever the old boyfriend’s around, clip should piss on her to mark his territory and show his dominance.[/quote]

Damn,that shit is cold,homey…

33

[quote]analog_kid wrote:
Don’t fall in love with girls that have crazy ex boyfriends. And don’t tell me your not in love with her. If you were “just messing around” with this girl you wouldn’t be contemplating murder.

You are so pussy whipped for even thinking about dealing with that kind of shit it’s redonkalis. Try to act like half a man with some balls next time, son.

[/quote]

Yo ! I saw this on The Onion.

Acorns Missing In Northeast
In states from Virginia to Maine, oak trees have failed to produce the usual abundance of acorns. What do you think?

Charlie Powell,
Systems Analyst
“Finally, the noble chestnut will get its due respect.”

Wendy Thompson,
Day Care Owner
“It’s a sad day when I have nothing to write in my acorn diary.”

Kevin Smerker,
Plumber
“It looks as though the revolt of the Maples as foretold by the bard Geddy Lee has finally come to pass.”

34

[quote]Dissonance wrote:
Oh well, there’s always next weekend.[/quote]

Bravo !

35

You all are right what you said about the weapons. I guess I wont just be quick to use them.

36

[quote]Magarhe wrote:
Dissonance, that is one crazy post, good one!

OP, treat that stalker ex real nice. One day, you’ll be the stalker ex, following her around, trying to get your money back.[/quote]

Yeah right

37

[quote]Neuromancer wrote:
imhungry wrote:
PRCalDude wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?

Yes. Whenever the old boyfriend’s around, clip should piss on her to mark his territory and show his dominance.

Damn,that shit is cold,homey…[/quote]

But necessary in certain cases.

It really does keep rival males from coming around.

38

Some of you all are real funny, but you all make lots of sense…I wont worry about it if there arent any threats invovlved or nothing like that.

As for the guns, its my second amendment right to have as many guns as I want. Some people for personal reasons dont believe in carrying guns or any kind of weapons, then there are those like me who do. Before I had a gun I had a knife, but I realized if Im gonna protect myself and my property I might as well do it the best way possible.

39

[quote]CrewPierce wrote:
clip11 wrote:
I keep a 40 caliber pistol in my armrest and a 20 gage shotgun in my trunk.

So you’re either a drug dealer or not so bright by what you just said. Pull into a gas station to pull our your gun on this guy? So what happens if you miss your target and hit the fuel pumps?

[/quote]

Why do I have to be a drug dealer or criminal because I have a couple guns? Is that CEO that owns ten guns also a drug dealer?

40

[quote]imhungry wrote:
Neuromancer wrote:
imhungry wrote:
PRCalDude wrote:
Christine wrote:
Pop a cap in him and slap her down.

LOL.

Can there be another answer besides a shooting spree?

Yes. Whenever the old boyfriend’s around, clip should piss on her to mark his territory and show his dominance.

Damn,that shit is cold,homey…

But necessary in certain cases.

It really does keep rival males from coming around. [/quote]

Not to mention you can make a movie out of it and make some green on the side…

41

[quote]analog_kid wrote:
You are so pussy whipped for even thinking about dealing with that kind of shit it’s redonkalis. Try to act like half a man with some balls next time, son.

[/quote]

Is that how you spell it…redonkalis?? I’ve been waiting to use that word and you stole it.

42

[quote]clip11 wrote:
Some of you all are real funny, but you all make lots of sense…I wont worry about it if there arent any threats invovlved or nothing like that.

As for the guns, its my second amendment right to have as many guns as I want. Some people for personal reasons dont believe in carrying guns or any kind of weapons, then there are those like me who do. Before I had a gun I had a knife, but I realized if Im gonna protect myself and my property I might as well do it the best way possible.[/quote]

Just be careful HH cuz shotgun bullets is bad fo yo health! Also, I prefer to carry a sword and shield and sometimes a mace for protection.

D

43

[quote]clip11 wrote:
I been messing with this woman since the beginning of summer, shes 3 years older than me (she’s 25 im 22).Just this past week an ex boyfriend of hers pop back up into the picture, but she dont want nothing to do with him. This guy is 31, too old to be acting lie this. Anyway he be sitting out watching her apartment and calling her phone 1000 times. So on Friday I go to pick her up and he was sitting out in the lot.

So she comes and gets into my car and we drive off and this guy follows us. I keep a 40 caliber pistol in my armrest and a 20 gage shotgun in my trunk. When i realized he was following us I wanted to pull into a gas station and hoped he would stop too so I could go put that guy in check, but the woman i was with didnt want me to and she wont tell me where her ex stays at, so I cant go over his house thats out.

Any tips on handling this legally and nonviolently?

Last time I was over there he was sitting out in the parking lot. I was ready to go out there and let off a few hollow points into his car, but she say it aint that serious and she dont want me to get locked up.[/quote]

ok, same thing happened to me.
your girls name isnt kristen is it, nevermind.
anyways whenever i came over her “ex” was there or he would call when I was around or whatever. same story as yours she didnt want him around he was crazy whatever, but for some reason she would not let me do anything to the guy, leave it alone she said because she was calling the cops if he came around again.

well come to find out she was banging the dude.
I leave and then she has some asshat call me up talking crap to me on the phone, telling me hes a cop and he will kill me and get away with it.
well,she told him the same story she told me but she used my name instead. I was trying to get away from her I moved on and yet she has some guy "protect’ her.

well the guy ended up in the hospital cause he was at my house. ( I did nothing my mom that lives 2 houses down shot him for intruding). and she left him for someone else. same story about the stalkers on her part whatever. I have heard from people that she has a history of doing that and her own cousins are trying to get her to see a shrink but she wont go.

Keep this in mind and watch she may be cheating and telling you a story to get you all heated to “prove your love”

44

If I own time shares in Hell, I can have fun with this post, yes?

Oh Mr. Green Light, please shine down on me.