So today I had to drop dad off at the dentist, his name is actually David too, kinda funny, Anyways, he is a lot like me, Genetically bad teeth, very sensitive teeth, fear of the dentist. So he gets sedated now. Anyways, I go to pick him up later in the day around 1:00 and I drive by a burger king. I start day dreaming about the juicy flame broiled whopper and I decide after I drop dad off at home, I’m going back. So I’m really starving because I usually eat lunch at around 11:00 - 12:00 and it’s like 1:40 by the time I get there. So I skip right over the Double whopper meal and go straight for the triple whopper with cheese. The old lady asks what size, I feel she somewhat expected me to pull a fast one and as for a small with a diet coke, but, like anyone who knows they might as well go big or go home, I go large with a full sugar coke.
I waxed that “little” sandwich down with barely a couple deep breaths, and the fries were hot and crispy and also dissapeared in short order. I didn’t even blink. I also ate all the little peice of crap parts of the fries at the very end, all the little sharp jagged little daggers they slip into the fries. Then I sipped my rediculously large coke for a few minutes while I patted my belly and gloated to myself at how much I just destroyed that meal.
Then there is a little menu on the wall as I leave. Triple Whopper with Cheese - Calories, 1250. Large Fries - Calories 540 (I had ketchsup too so add another what 40?). Coca-Cola Large - Calories 380. That’s 2,210 calories Homies!!!
Now Hide Ya Burgers, Hide Ya Fries, and Hide ya Sodas, cause I’m eatin everything out here.
[quote]kothreat wrote:
Wait a minute here. You eat your fries after your burger? [/quote]
Burgers taste better than fries. If you eat the fries first, the burger get’s cold. Fuck a cold burger, that’s sacriligious. Cold fries, meh. Throw 'em in the trash can, those fries are nuked beyond imagination anyways.
Why even bother with fries? Why not get more burgers?
[quote]kothreat wrote:
Wait a minute here. You eat your fries after your burger? [/quote]
Burgers taste better than fries. If you eat the fries first, the burger get’s cold. Fuck a cold burger, that’s sacriligious. Cold fries, meh. Throw 'em in the trash can, those fries are nuked beyond imagination anyways.
Why even bother with fries? Why not get more burgers?
[/quote]
Nail on the head right there.
I’ll feel really shitty if I do get full and leave meat on the plate because I ate my fries first.
[quote]kothreat wrote:
Wait a minute here. You eat your fries after your burger? [/quote]
Burgers taste better than fries. If you eat the fries first, the burger get’s cold. Fuck a cold burger, that’s sacriligious. Cold fries, meh. Throw 'em in the trash can, those fries are nuked beyond imagination anyways.
Why even bother with fries? Why not get more burgers?
[/quote]
Nail on the head right there.
I’ll feel really shitty if I do get full and leave meat on the plate because I ate my fries first.
V[/quote]
Oh, didn’t know you guys were pussies. The burger tasting better is the exact reason to eat it last.
I guess if it takes you 20 minutes to eat some fries. Always save the best for last
1 - Open your burger.
2 - Insert fries, layered like lattice. At least 4 layers.
3 - More ketchup
4 - Close burger
5 - Eat the fuck out of it
6 - ???
7 - PROFIT!
[quote]Im_New_Feed_Me wrote:
1 - Open your burger.
2 - Insert fries, layered like lattice. At least 4 layers.
3 - More ketchup
4 - Close burger
5 - Eat the fuck out of it
6 - ???
7 - PROFIT![/quote]
This, plus throw a 4-piece chicken nugget on there too, maybe some bbq sauce to hold it all together.
Have any of you “big men” done a triple whopper? I’m not saying I’m the king of eating, Lanky can probably claim that, but I’m not just talking about a burger here. Did you guys see the calorie count in that meal? Thats a whole days worth of food for one of these “abs” guys I hear about.
I mean I did eat a few fries here and there, but I just finished the last half of the fries after.
You want me to give you a bite by bite breakdown? Ok here goes.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
Finish fries.
I’m only estimating the number of bites of burger I actually had, I just wanted to give a general idea of exactly what I mean in my OP just to clear up any confusion.
Next time I get a triple whopper I’m going to stop at Mcdonalds first and get two cheeseburgers, then I’ll replace the triple whopper buns with the cheeseburgers.
Does anybody leave an absolutely MASSIVE bit of burger right until the end? Its like, nibble nibble, nibble nibble, until you’ve crafted it down to a 5cm square bit of burder + no overhanging bread.
Open it up a bit to make sure it has the right amount of ketchup/bbq sauce and then throw it in your mouth.
Close your eyes and eat the last bit in slow mo, making sure that every tastebud in your mouth gets a good dose of every bit of that burger.
[quote]Vegita wrote:
Have any of you “big men” done a triple whopper? I’m not saying I’m the king of eating, Lanky can probably claim that, but I’m not just talking about a burger here. Did you guys see the calorie count in that meal? Thats a whole days worth of food for one of these “abs” guys I hear about.
I mean I did eat a few fries here and there, but I just finished the last half of the fries after.
You want me to give you a bite by bite breakdown? Ok here goes.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
2 fries, dipped in ketchup. Bite of burger. 2 fries, dipped in ketchup, Bite of Burger.
Finish fries.
I’m only estimating the number of bites of burger I actually had, I just wanted to give a general idea of exactly what I mean in my OP just to clear up any confusion.
Next time I get a triple whopper I’m going to stop at Mcdonalds first and get two cheeseburgers, then I’ll replace the triple whopper buns with the cheeseburgers.
MMmmmmmmmmmmm.
V[/quote]
I’ve done a 5 patty teen burger. Does that count. With a large root beer. Don’t remember having fried though.
I’m neurotic like that though. I have to eat food in a certain way…or the THEY will know.