Changing Room Guy?

Off Topic
1

I was in the gym the other day and this guy comes over to me wearing not so much as a pair of pink cycling shorts and a skin hugging white t-shirt that would have made a 70’s porn star ashamed of himself. He starts talking to me but I have my headphones on, so, not wanting to be a dick, I just smile politely and nod my head in agreement with whatever shit he’s wittering on about, and get on with the rest of my workout. I think this works because he gives me back a big ole smile, winks at me and walks off. Thank fuck.

Anyways, about a week later I see this punk again and he comes heading over, only this time I don’t have my headphones on so I can’t get out of speaking to him. He sparks up a conversation and I actually find he’s a pretty decent guy, only he keeps going on about “our secret” but I don’t ask what he’s on about, and just leave it. I finish my session and head back to the changing rooms.

In there I meet this guy again and he’s like giving me all this shit. I tell him I don’t know what he’s on about, but he pulls out his cock and starts waving it about at all the other people and screaming stuff about me. I run out and haven’t been back since. What did I do to upset him?

2

Way to obliviously nod in agreement to meet a strange man later in the locker room for a blowjay only to stand him up.

Dick move buddy

3

I thought that but he was pissed with me immediately as I entered the changing rooms. There’s some fucking weirdos in gyms nowadays. You can’t even be polite anymore without getting an eye full of cock and a ringing in your ears from some nutcase.

4

Did you try hitting him or putting it in his butt yet? If not don’t come back until you try various combo’s of those 2 options.

5

You gotta make with the head now, or this won’t go away.

6

Yup. You pretty much sealed it buddy. You’re going to have to give up the mouth sex for this random dude.

Just say “no homo” afterwards to get rid of any ghey you might contract. Good luck man.

7

You’re a fucking tease. Y

8

You’re a fucking tease! You will suck this one, bro!

9

It kind of sounds like something that could’ve happened in “Seinfeld”

Maybe it’s like the puffy shirt episode.

10

Agree with the others in that you should blow him. It won’t matter because your not really gay (nttawwt).

DB

11

Quite literally, a tube steak boogie.

12

OP: I was just asking if you would put on that lipstick and blow me. You didn’t have to get all weird about it.

13

The trolls are getting less creative it seems.

I am disappointed.

14

Put it in his pooper. HARD. Maybe he will learn his lesson.

15

I’m going back to the gym tonight for the first time since he went crazy. If I bump into him I’ll apologise to him for giving him any ideas (assuming that the consensus thesis among you is correct i.e. that I led him into believing I’d give him man head) and see if that’ll satisfy him. I think you’re all just trying to get me in trouble by telling me to actually suck his willy though. Fair play, if I was in your position I’d probably do the same. I’ll report back later…

16

[quote]Westclock wrote:
The trolls are getting less creative it seems.

I am disappointed.[/quote]

He’s been a member since 2008, doubtful he’s a troll.

Still, we have Nominal Prospect around here, any other troll seems crap compared to him anyway…

17

And OP, why didn’t you get down on your knees and suck it pray tell? I was asking you a simple question but you kept on nodding and shit and then when I asked if you’d blow me you nodded your head so I stuck my dick out and started waving it around screaming SUCK MY DICK SISSY BOY SUCK ME SUCK IT! And then you just ran off and I haven’t seen you since.

18

Maybe he was just French?

19

Just got back from my session about 2 hours ago. The weird changing room guy wasn’t there but I did get speaking to one of the duty managers and apparently this guy isn’t unknown around the area. It seems in fact that he’s been banned from pretty much every iron dungeon, bar and pub for miles around and it is, in the parlence of my American friends, just “my bad”

I was told that pinky drawers has been causing trouble for a few years now; the usual litany of gym sins e.g. wearing baggy high cut shorts while on the abductor/adductor (or as Dan John calls it, the "inny/outty machine) contraption, and accidently letting his member drop forth and giving the hot chick walking past an eyeful of something grandfather used to keep to himself. It seems my biggest mistake was to acknowledge this blokes existence. Most dudes either lamped him one in the chops or told him in no uncertain terms what to do with himself.

It seems I got a lucky escape. I think my re-telling of my own encounter with this randy old swine has put the brakes on any other chance he’s got of standing in the showers with full wood and acting like nothings wrong.

I just want to thank my co-T-nationers for all their support in this matter. If I was 2 IQ points less than I already am I might have followed your advice and proceeded to:

a) blowjay a strange man;

b) hit him or put it in his butt;

c) make with the head;

d) give up the mouth sex;

e) suck this one, bro!;

f) blow him, it won’t matter because (I’m) not really gay;

g) put on that lipstick and blow (him);

h) put it in his pooper, HARD, (and) maybe he will learn his lesson;

and i) get down on (my) knees and suck it.

Cheers lads and ladettes.

O, and to which ever person said I was a troll, I’m not. I just never had any encounter in a gym worth sharing until now. I forgive you though, its not your fault.

20

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
Quite literally, a tube steak boogie.[/quote]

So what about this part? Did I miss it?