Best Blackout Story

Off Topic
41

Too many to list.

One I’ll share the ending of, or when I came to- was waking up naked with no idea where I was or how I got there in a nice house next to a pretty decent blond haired girl. I panicked a little and started looking around for my clothes and out some windows to get my bearings on where I was. Found my clothes and started sorting through the mail to get the name of the girl in bed. Jenny Somethingstein- O.K. check.

So Jenny wakes up and wanders in to the kitchen. We exchange glances, but things are awkward and I have no idea where to begin. So I ask her- “Jen, where the hell are we, and how did I get here?”.

She responds- “My name isn’t Jen. Thats my room mate. You really don’t remember anything, do you?”

Me- “Nope. Last thing I knew, me, Mike and Dean were doing shots of 151.”.

Her- “Well then, maybe one of them will explain where you are and how you got here.”.
Then she went back into her room and slammed the door.

Turns out that me and two buddies went bar hopping for a couple of hours after I checked out, and managed to hook up with 3 flight attendants who share rent on a house and just got done with their flight schedule.

Then there was that night in a trailer park just north of FT. Worth when I came to and some really pissed off meth head had an M1 carbine to my head, screaming about what a mother fucking asshole I am…

42

[quote]bond james bond wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:
When I was 19 or 20 I went too Oktoberfest and drank to much wine and knew I was severely fucked up by about 7:30PM, so I left and waited for the bus, but fell asleep (aka: “blacked out”) and woke up just in time for my bus…but it was the last one of the night at that…about 1:30AM, so I;d been sleeping on the ground next to the bus stop in downtown Winnipeg for about 5 hours.
Still had my wallet and all organs still inside my body![/quote]

Wait, you went to Oktoberfest and drank WINE? And you call yourself Canadian.[/quote]

Exactly. He’s Canadian, not German.[/quote]

Apparently NJ is too far from Canada to recognize the Canadian affinity for beer. Hailing from Canada doesn’t preclude one from having German ancestry, or is he drinking wine because he is French?
[/quote]

No way he has french Canadian ancestry, please God no, anything but that :wink:

You’re right on the money about an affinity for beer Testy. I had a kid sized beer mug just for me when I was a little dripper. I would get home from saturdaynight mass with my Mom and Dad and watch Hockey Night in Canada with a chilled mug o’ 50, good times.

[/quote]

I couldn’t post fast enough that NO…I HAVE NO FRENCH ANCESTRY!

Phew! I hope nobody thought I did for more than the few hours that Testy’s post was up!

43

[quote]Nards wrote:

[quote]bond james bond wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:
When I was 19 or 20 I went too Oktoberfest and drank to much wine and knew I was severely fucked up by about 7:30PM, so I left and waited for the bus, but fell asleep (aka: “blacked out”) and woke up just in time for my bus…but it was the last one of the night at that…about 1:30AM, so I;d been sleeping on the ground next to the bus stop in downtown Winnipeg for about 5 hours.
Still had my wallet and all organs still inside my body![/quote]

Wait, you went to Oktoberfest and drank WINE? And you call yourself Canadian.[/quote]

Exactly. He’s Canadian, not German.[/quote]

Apparently NJ is too far from Canada to recognize the Canadian affinity for beer. Hailing from Canada doesn’t preclude one from having German ancestry, or is he drinking wine because he is French?
[/quote]

No way he has french Canadian ancestry, please God no, anything but that :wink:

You’re right on the money about an affinity for beer Testy. I had a kid sized beer mug just for me when I was a little dripper. I would get home from saturdaynight mass with my Mom and Dad and watch Hockey Night in Canada with a chilled mug o’ 50, good times.

[/quote]

I couldn’t post fast enough that NO…I HAVE NO FRENCH ANCESTRY!

Phew! I hope nobody thought I did for more than the few hours that Testy’s post was up![/quote]

Whats wrong with French Canadian?

44

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:

[quote]bond james bond wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:
When I was 19 or 20 I went too Oktoberfest and drank to much wine and knew I was severely fucked up by about 7:30PM, so I left and waited for the bus, but fell asleep (aka: “blacked out”) and woke up just in time for my bus…but it was the last one of the night at that…about 1:30AM, so I;d been sleeping on the ground next to the bus stop in downtown Winnipeg for about 5 hours.
Still had my wallet and all organs still inside my body![/quote]

Wait, you went to Oktoberfest and drank WINE? And you call yourself Canadian.[/quote]

Exactly. He’s Canadian, not German.[/quote]

Apparently NJ is too far from Canada to recognize the Canadian affinity for beer. Hailing from Canada doesn’t preclude one from having German ancestry, or is he drinking wine because he is French?
[/quote]

No way he has french Canadian ancestry, please God no, anything but that :wink:

You’re right on the money about an affinity for beer Testy. I had a kid sized beer mug just for me when I was a little dripper. I would get home from saturdaynight mass with my Mom and Dad and watch Hockey Night in Canada with a chilled mug o’ 50, good times.

[/quote]

I couldn’t post fast enough that NO…I HAVE NO FRENCH ANCESTRY!

Phew! I hope nobody thought I did for more than the few hours that Testy’s post was up![/quote]

Whats wrong with French Canadian? [/quote]
Basically everything.

45

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:

[quote]bond james bond wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]Nards wrote:
When I was 19 or 20 I went too Oktoberfest and drank to much wine and knew I was severely fucked up by about 7:30PM, so I left and waited for the bus, but fell asleep (aka: “blacked out”) and woke up just in time for my bus…but it was the last one of the night at that…about 1:30AM, so I;d been sleeping on the ground next to the bus stop in downtown Winnipeg for about 5 hours.
Still had my wallet and all organs still inside my body![/quote]

Wait, you went to Oktoberfest and drank WINE? And you call yourself Canadian.[/quote]

Exactly. He’s Canadian, not German.[/quote]

Apparently NJ is too far from Canada to recognize the Canadian affinity for beer. Hailing from Canada doesn’t preclude one from having German ancestry, or is he drinking wine because he is French?
[/quote]

No way he has french Canadian ancestry, please God no, anything but that :wink:

You’re right on the money about an affinity for beer Testy. I had a kid sized beer mug just for me when I was a little dripper. I would get home from saturdaynight mass with my Mom and Dad and watch Hockey Night in Canada with a chilled mug o’ 50, good times.

[/quote]

I couldn’t post fast enough that NO…I HAVE NO FRENCH ANCESTRY!

Phew! I hope nobody thought I did for more than the few hours that Testy’s post was up![/quote]

Whats wrong with French Canadian? [/quote]

In my (albeit limited) experience French Canadian chicks are hot. And kinky.

46

all good stuff getting posted, very funny, keep em coming…

47

I used to black out all the time when I still drank (actually quit because I couldn’t control my intake and everytime I drank wound up blacked out and doing something stupid . . .). Had a couple 4-5 hour walks home from the bar in freezing weather, punched a few friends in the face, that sort of thing.

One of my favourites, was down in Vegas for a trifecta bachelor party (3 close friends who were all getting married in the same summer). It was a crew of maybe 12-13 guys, and we had complimentary bottle service at the Vanity at the Hard Rock. Got destroyed on vodka-redbulls. Last thing I remember is leaving the club and wandering around the casino. Black back in, and I’m lugging a 4 footish high traffic cone (I swear, this thing was massive) through the gardens at the Tuscany with security screaming at me to stop. Having no idea what the fuck is going on I oblige, and get taken inside, interrogated about why I was stealing the traffic cone (I still have no idea) what drugs I was taking (I’ve never taken any drugs, just boozed like a motherfucker) and why my shirt had blood on it (again, no idea, all I know is it wasn’t mine). Avoided being arrested by virtue of the fact that I’m Canadian and it would’ve been too much trouble and they stuck me in a cab and sent me on my way.

Last night I had anything to drink, it was another friend’s bachelor party. We’d gone out of town to avoid seeing anyone he knew while we were out. I have snippets of memory from the club we went to but don’t really remember leaving the hotel. Apparently, after the club we went to the strippers, where I was either spitting on the table or vomiting in perv row. So, instead of getting kicked out, the bouncers sent/carried me to the bathroom so I could proceed to vomit properly, where somehow a friend of mine wound up puking in my stead while I sent naughty inappropriate drunk texts to girls I really shouldn’t have been sending naughty inappropriate drunk texts to. Woke up in the hotel the next morning with no recollection of even being at the strippers, or most of the night in general.

48

I met a chick at a party and we went to my truck for a blowjob. We wound up fucking instead. She said she.was on birth control so I just came in her.

I can stay hard and kept fucking her when I noticed some people outside watching. I flipped her off me and put her doggy across the truck seat bench and went to town, full moon for my audience. She didn’t know.

We fucked for awhile and finally she went home and I went back to the party where I blacked later but the first part is better.

49

Both of these were while I was young

My first time was at a campout, maybe 20 something guys/gals. I was young. I guess I kind of faded in and out. Because I can still remember some things in sequence but their are big patches missing inbetween. I can remember thinking "Okay, Im getting drunk, good times’ Then I can remeber a girl I went to HS with, older than me, she was probably a senior when I was a freshman. Sitting me down in the bed of a truck and telling me to stay. I told her to go get me a beer, and when she left, I got up and started hunting another beer, cuz I wasnt gonna let any girl tell me I had a bedtime. Then, I can remember falling down when I went to take a piss, getting tied to the running board of a truck. Apperently so I wouldn’t wander off anymore. More people telling me to stop messing around, that I was too belligerent to drink anymore. I can remember bouts of vomiting, followed by bouts of darkness and loud noises. I can remember yelling bad names at girls.

The next morning I learned that I pissed in one of my friends sleeping bags. pissed all over my jeans and shirt. Thrown up on lawn chairs and various pickups. And just overall had a good ole time.

This other time, I made it home after a night of whiskey, and some damn good BBQ from this place in my hometown. I crawled in the front door and managed to make it onto the couch. After that, I dont remember much. I woke up the next morning feeling oddly refreshed. So I cleaned up all the BBQ puke off the floor, and out of the bathroom/and kitchen sink. That I had apparently neglected to clean the night before. And left for work. It was everywhere, god…it was terrible. And the room smelled like amonia and dead bird. It was just sick. To this day, I can’t drink whiskey w/o thinking of that morning.

Oh yeah, another great part of that morning was waking up and discovering the most horrific smell originating from my underwear. A white, greasy substance smeared all over my thighs, belly, and man-part. I think it was lotion… But can’t be 100% sure. It smelled pretty bad at any rate. And no, it was not Ghey related.

50

Not directly related with me

It happened it in a saturday night near christmas. My buddies and I were walking out from a tim horton at night, completely drunk. Classic night of drinking and all that stuff. 2 of them start fighting on top of a bridge over the highway for some timbits (small round donuts). The police comes in, 3 cars and a couple of dogs barking and all that and guess what? One the policewoman was a cousin of my buddy, a cousin he only sees with the whole family at christmas (the next week)! We got away with it because they seen that we were harmless middle class 18 years old.

51

Oh wait this isnt a blackout story. Sorry.

52

[quote]awesomeguy1234 wrote:
guess i should share…

blacked out at my brother’s rehersal dinner for his wedding, woke up naked in my bed with my face killing me and puke all over my bathroom.

the wedding was at a bed and breakfast and according to my brother after dinner and 8 beers, i grabbed a bottle of vodka from one of his friends, chugged it for about 30 seconds and then proceeded to throughout the night punch his best man in the face, tried to fuck his ex girlfriend and every bridesmaid by telling them i loved them and ‘had a room’, wandered to my room passed out, woke up and puked, then walked downstairs naked looking to party some more where my other brother had to punch me in the face twice to get me to go back upstairs.

bonus: fucked my brother’s wife’s cousin at the reception and was confronted by her uncle the next day angrily saying ‘so what are your intentions with my niece?’ to which my mom said ‘leave my son alone’. he backed down. [/quote]
“had a room” LOL!

Sometimes I get hammered at a hotel bar when out of town and I use this line when I’m too lazy to flirt.

“Hey you, you’re pretty. I’m in room ___ come by if you want”.

It has worked once and I think she thought I was sober and being funny. She was not pretty though.

So to elaborate on an earlier story, I keep a handgun under my driver seat. About three am I was shit canned and joy riding in Houston. I got tired of waiting for a red light and shot it. Kicked off a spree. I have no idea how I didn’t get caught. We have traffic cams.

My buddy was freaking out in the passenger seat. I was so nervous watching the news, scared I accidentally hurt some one. Nothing came of it, thank God.

53

[quote]TYR wrote:
I was stabbed to death. :slight_smile: Woke up in the hospital where I was told what happened to me.

[/quote]

…but you’re still alive.

54

[quote]FightinIrish26 wrote:
I’ve blacked out a number of times.

The stories that came out were never the good kind and I regret them.

There is nothing fun nor admirable about being so uncontrollably drunk that you aren’t even yourself.

I do my best to avoid such things whenever I drink now.[/quote]

Agree. Only recently have I started to black out ( I’m 21 ). Once I had the first one, about a year ago, they have become more and more frequent. Only recently have I been able to get control of it. The tamiest are just very very vague nights and the worse are 5-6 hours of totally missing time. I have had two of these and they were very scary in hindsight. The thing that makes them worse is that at no point in the night do I remember thinking " I’m getting really drunk ". For example - the last black out I remember being in the bar and being about 3 pints in. We decide we are going to walk to a club that is a good 20 minutes away. We go to the liquor store across the street and buy a 40 of vodka. I then woke up in my bed. This is literally how my memories goes , the scary part being that when I last remember I was really not that drunk at all. This has happened before too showing me that the blackout can “work backwards” if that makes sense. Anyone else experience this ?

For the record - I have had many night were I have drank 15 + ounces of booze and have perfect memory.

55

Yeah the one time I got anywhere close to blacked out ended up with my then incredibly neurotic girlfriend going through a week of neurotic angst, which included taking the ‘Plan B’ pill system THREE TIMES and getting 5 pregnancy tests. Yeah. That cured me of heavy drinking. And it cured me of the desire to have a girlfriend for almost a full two years after that.

56

[quote]overstand wrote:
Freshmen year of college, my first frat party. I bought a bottle of vodka for me and my date, she took a few shots and I finished most of the rest of the bottle. I was blackout drunk before we even got to the little club we had rented out. I ended up peeing in a trashcan and calling my date by her best friend’s name all night.

Me and a buddy decided it would be a great idea to walk 3 miles back to the dorms, which probably would have been the smart thing to do at that point except I had lost my shoes, so I walked back barefoot. I woke up on the wrong floor in some random girls’ dorm room. Apparently I was being interrogated by police when these girls saw me and claimed I was their friend and they’d take me home. They brought me to my room, but I had left my keys in my date’s purse and my roommate was still out, so they let me sleep on the floor in their dorm.

I managed to track down my shoes and keys and actually ended up dating the first girl for a few months.[/quote]

damn, you must really look like a nice guy, i once visited a friend in college lost him and all his friends and had left my phone at his place, asked several girls walking home from the bar if i could crash on their floor, their responses were less than favorable, ended up passing out in somebodys front yard, woke up the next day and wandered around the town and campus looking like a drifter trying to find my friends place.

57

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
Too many to list.

One I’ll share the ending of, or when I came to- was waking up naked with no idea where I was or how I got there in a nice house next to a pretty decent blond haired girl. I panicked a little and started looking around for my clothes and out some windows to get my bearings on where I was. Found my clothes and started sorting through the mail to get the name of the girl in bed. Jenny Somethingstein- O.K. check.

So Jenny wakes up and wanders in to the kitchen. We exchange glances, but things are awkward and I have no idea where to begin. So I ask her- “Jen, where the hell are we, and how did I get here?”.

She responds- “My name isn’t Jen. Thats my room mate. You really don’t remember anything, do you?”

Me- “Nope. Last thing I knew, me, Mike and Dean were doing shots of 151.”.

Her- “Well then, maybe one of them will explain where you are and how you got here.”.
Then she went back into her room and slammed the door.

Turns out that me and two buddies went bar hopping for a couple of hours after I checked out, and managed to hook up with 3 flight attendants who share rent on a house and just got done with their flight schedule.

Then there was that night in a trailer park just north of FT. Worth when I came to and some really pissed off meth head had an M1 carbine to my head, screaming about what a mother fucking asshole I am…
[/quote]

ive checked mail to get a girls name before after waking up next to her, but as you obviously know it can backfire. you need to elaborate on the trailer park story… trust tree

58

[quote]HoustonGuy wrote:

[quote]awesomeguy1234 wrote:
guess i should share…

blacked out at my brother’s rehersal dinner for his wedding, woke up naked in my bed with my face killing me and puke all over my bathroom.

the wedding was at a bed and breakfast and according to my brother after dinner and 8 beers, i grabbed a bottle of vodka from one of his friends, chugged it for about 30 seconds and then proceeded to throughout the night punch his best man in the face, tried to fuck his ex girlfriend and every bridesmaid by telling them i loved them and ‘had a room’, wandered to my room passed out, woke up and puked, then walked downstairs naked looking to party some more where my other brother had to punch me in the face twice to get me to go back upstairs.

bonus: fucked my brother’s wife’s cousin at the reception and was confronted by her uncle the next day angrily saying ‘so what are your intentions with my niece?’ to which my mom said ‘leave my son alone’. he backed down. [/quote]
“had a room” LOL!

Sometimes I get hammered at a hotel bar when out of town and I use this line when I’m too lazy to flirt.

“Hey you, you’re pretty. I’m in room ___ come by if you want”.

It has worked once and I think she thought I was sober and being funny. She was not pretty though.

So to elaborate on an earlier story, I keep a handgun under my driver seat. About three am I was shit canned and joy riding in Houston. I got tired of waiting for a red light and shot it. Kicked off a spree. I have no idea how I didn’t get caught. We have traffic cams.

My buddy was freaking out in the passenger seat. I was so nervous watching the news, scared I accidentally hurt some one. Nothing came of it, thank God.[/quote]

public car sex, shooting out stop lights, leaving the scene of an accident, causing a crawfish outbreak in a college dorm… if im ever in texas im gonna have to make my way through houston.

59

Looks like somebody has a man crush!!

60

[quote]StevenF wrote:
Looks like somebody has a man crush!! [/quote]

Bromance