Work for today:
Neversate linear program week 4 day 1
Giant set 1:
Box jump: 3, 3, 3, 3
Trap bar deadlift: 150x5, 240x3, 330x8, 360x8, 360x8, 380x8 (Comeback PR) (Belt notch 5)
Ab wheel: 5, 5, 5, 5,
Giant set 2:
Box jump: 3, 3, 3
Front squat: 135x8, 145x8, 145x8
Russian twist: 10, 10, 10
Giant set 3:
Banded Chin: 3, 3, 4 (Comeback PR)
Kb swing: 53lbx10, 53lbx10, 53lbx10
Lunge: 6, 6, 6
Notes:
Today was amazing. I really can’t think of any other way to describe it. Not the lifting, not really. The I moved my weights well, but it’s nothing I haven’t done before. But my mindset was different than it has been in a very, very long time.
All my life, i have been a pretty aggressive guy. I don’t mean a hothead or some ego driven dick. I mean, I have always been the guy to just commit 100% into anything I’m doing, and to try to do things that honestly i may have no business doing. Maybe intense is a better word. But it’s been a big part of me, through everything. When I did my school work, I worked hard and crushed it, 4.0, 35 ACT, the works. Applying to colleges, I applied to 27 schools across the country, determined to get into somewhere good. At college, I tried out for all sorts of sports I had never played before, and got some field time in a few of them. I’ve chased every leadership position that was ever available to me, attempted any physical challenge thrown my way, be it football practices in high school or the MARSOT screeners at the academy. I always wanted to do more, to try for more, to just fucking send it and see what I could really do.
Somewhere in this last year or so, I lost that. 18 months at sea in the last 2 years, gyms closed, an awful command climate, seeing some of the men under my command truly struggle with things that my chain of command wouldn’t let me help with, it took a toll on me. Some may call it depression, I don’t know. I’ve certainly never talked with a shrink about it, or anything like that. But I felt down. I felt tired when I woke up, i gained a shameful amount of weight, I didn’t really have much motivation, my only driving factor was knowing I was the only real thing protecting my guys from the shit show going on with the higher ups (several of which I just learned have been removed from command and are being processed out of the Navy.)
Getting to a new command has helped. I’m with my wife, I can get more than 4 hours of sleep a night, I have really cleaned up my diet and am down 9lbs In the last 3 weeks. Life is just starting to look up a bit, and I find myself looking forward to training.
Which brings me to my last set of deadlifts. Look, this may be ridiculous, but I needed it. I hit my 3rd working set, and it felt good. I wanted to go for a PR, and I was debating between 370 and 380. I thought “don’t be dumb, take the little win” and loaded up 370. I’m waiting, about to start my set, and all I can think is “you should of picked 380.” So i did. In the middle of my garage, I just started yelling “fuck it! Fuck it!” And I added the extra 5 lbs.
The next set, I felt alive. I was exploding on my box jumps, slamming onto the box like I was mad at it. I nearly sprint to my trap bar, grip it and absolutely rip it. It was heavy, my body still has some catching up to do, but damn if I wasn’t able to dig into a reservoir that I haven’t touched in a long time. I finished the set, did my ab wheel rollouts, and just dropped to the floor. I cried. Just for a minute, but I did. I don’t know why, I don’t think I have cried in years, but I did. And I needed to.
This isn’t a one stop fix. I’m not magically the man I used to be. I need to build myself back, mentally and physically. But today was a big day for me. My wife said I seem happier, I’m smiling more. I feel a bit more optimistic. I’m not back, but I’m coming, and it’s damn good to say that.
While I’m being all uncharacteristically emotional, I want to say a few thanks. @alpha brother, I don’t even think you look here anymore, maybe I should shoot you an email, but your work ethic has absolutely inspired me, and the coaching and mentorship you showed those few times I visited your gym was a landmark moment in my training career. @T3hPwnisher i have been following your log since I was in high school, long before I even made an account. Your dedication and intensity are beyond admirable, and I definitely count you among the list of men I just genuinely respect. Thanks for all the advice over the years, and for being a hell of a role model on building back from adversity. @throwawayfitness dude, your transformation looked like one of those get ripped quick scams, except you actually freaking did it. The day to day consistency is 100% the key to success, and you are proof of it @simo74 @wanna_be @cstan097 @SkyzykS gents, thanks for following along. May be dumb, but I definitely do think about whose gonna read my workouts and judge me if I bitch out. Thanks for the help upholding a standard.
Alright, this is long enough. It was a good day.
glad I’m not alone.
