For Emily:
The best thing is the comments.
Those guys have never heard of the manosphere, or game and the second they read it they see it:
as a guy who was in the 80% who struggled in his 20’s you have to love the power shift - reading this there is no sympathy at all - being married though i can’t take advantage of this shift which is a bit of a pity
I’m another of those Beta males, now just into my 30s, and I think the article is pretty damn accurate. Not that i’m complaining now, my range of relationship choices has widened considerably as i’ve got older.
I am amazed at the number of late 20’s and 30’s woman that throw themselves at me. It happens daily- at work , when I am out , at the gym, at social gatherings etc.
It is so obvious that women will hate this article, yet men can relate…
I was one of the males during my late teens and 20’s who was always overlooked. I certainly came to the realisation that many women with looks and education were shallow and never interested in what lay within a man.
When I found financial security in my late 30’s all of a sudden I was desireable and now the ball was in my court.
My partners were in their 20’s and the women in their 30’s somehow felt they had more right to my attention…Sorry, it doesn’t work that way.
I am now in my early 50’s. My partner of five years is 28 and our relationship is great and perfectly balanced emotionally…Am I now the one who is shallow? Maybe, but the odds are in my favour and both libido and sperm are healthy…It’s nature
totally agree with this article. I am in my final yr of uni and looking for a relationship. For the past 2 months I have asked out 6 girls all fails and each one having very similar excuses of, “not ready for dating/not interested/ I can’t commit to anything”. Being in my early 20s I still like to go out and party however I see what I want in the future and prefer to be in a solid relationship when I graduate. the uni lifestyle is perfect to start a relationship as uni is not only an education institute but a social scene. I think females when they are young don’t want to ‘settle’ into a relationship instead they look for the best guy to hook up with. According to this article females in their 30s wonder where all the good guys went, my question is to count how many guys they turned down during their 20s?
If a casual census of my friends and acquaintances over the years, both male and female, is anything to go by then this article is more or less bang on the money. I got no action with women in my 20s - they just weren’t interested. Hit my 30s, and bang! Things virtually turned on a dime.
It’s unfortunate that many of the Beta males that get rejected in their 20s, almost as if it were a law of physics, develop a rank misogynist attitude during this period of their lives. They are then loosed on a population of women who could hardly suspect the kind of cynical attitude towards women and relationships.
aha! When a man ends a relationship he’s ‘afraid of commitment’ but a woman can reject 100 decent guys because she is ‘looking for Mister Right’!
When I was in my 30s I stopped dating women in their 30s because I got fed up with their anger. (And women, if you don’t think you’re angry, just read your own comments!) They almost seemed contemptuous of my beta male status and would spend half the night going on about how rotten men were, bitching to me about things that other men did.
And now that their biological clock was ticking and they were prepared to settle down I was also expected to play the role of provider. In other words, now that they were finally prepared to date someone like me, I didn’t feel like I was a prospective partner as much as I was a superannuation fund.
Women as a gender have the option of fighting it out in a buyers market, or avoiding the buyers market by looking earlier, or at least bettering their odds.
She’s also completely right about the bitterness that is engendered in the 80% during their 20s. You will see many many men in their 30s suddenly becoming popular that are incredibly bitter that the same women weren’t paying attention to them before.
“many of his female members are determined to meet only men who are tall, attractive, wealthy and well educated. They want the alpha males”
but then you have this:
"‘‘It’s wall-to-wall arseholes out there,’’ reports Penny, a 31-year-old lawyer. She is stunned by how hard it is to meet suitable men willing to commit. ‘‘I’m horrified by the number of gorgeous, independent and successful women my age who can’t meet a decent man.’’
I know who the arseholes are here and it’s not the men.
As a man who got married at 30 and then found himself out “in the dating market” in my mid 40s I am staggered at the shift in the dynamics. As a young bloke I was part of the 80% but now the game has changed completely. Getting dates is zero problem, women around my age literally throw themselves at me. For a while it was a boost to the ego but now it is kind of sad. Most of these women seem to be in a panic state that they will end up alone and that terrifies them. As a middle aged man trying to find a partner it is not easy, it is my experience that all the women are either married or chronically desperate.
I am now late 30s. In my 20s I would meet women here and there. However in my late 30s there is now the perfect storm.
1- I have matured and understand women a lot better.
2. Most other men my age are either taken, let themselves go, or don’t have their shit together.
3. Once women hit 30, their options drop significantly and fast.
Needless to say my life is filled with some great women and in terms of settling down, I am probably looking for the twentysomething that is more interested in a 30something man that has his shit together - there are a few out there.
I do feel sorry for all the great single women around but if you are a young women reading this, there is a very high likelihood that sooner or later in life you will want to settle down and have kids despite what you think. Try stay open to the idea of meeting one and committing in your twenties, it only gets harder.
Supply and demand is a bitch for us all sometimes.
Bettina you are ruthless, I cannot believe how true this is. If Bettina was a male she would have be criticised a lot more by now.
I found myself smiling, laughing and even losing breath at times while reading this. I can vouch for this 100%. I’ve just been too scared to tell anyone else.
It’s not too often that the truth gets told like this when it must be such a scary truth for many women out there.
I’m just so glad that someone has the guts to write it like it is. In regards to males, females, society and expectations it’s very rare these days to hear the truth.
This is a breath of fresh air. Thank goodness it’s out in the open.
This article describes the situation in a very accurate way. I have to say, life is about choices and with choices comes risk. Women who chose to party-off their 20’s and could’nt give a damn fuck about guys that wanted their attention now live desparate and lonely lives.
Nothing could describe the situation more accuractly then
"‘‘They are with an ‘8’ but they want a ‘10’. But then suddenly they’re 40 and can only get a ‘5’!’’
don’t think that this is the case will all single females in there 30s but i have noticed that some ladies who would not have been interested in my partner 6 years ago because he was not successful enough and now find him more attractive because he has moved up at work and bought a house… i think some girls just want this perfect guy and miss out on all the great guys who have everything ahead of them.
See Emily, all these men made the exact same experiences as me and they react to it the same way I do.
Turns out, being a little introverted, intelligent and some measure of impulse control can get you far in life, it just does not get you laid that much in your 20s.
However, the SMP turns on a dime at around 30 and suddenly women dont like to reap what they have sown.