[quote]A Ninny Mouse wrote:
Much rage have I. I put a hole in a wall at my old high school because people are incompetent annoying, and my gf was giving me shit. To this day she still gives me shit about that. I have these urges on a regular basis to turn around and punch annoying people I overhear in class or stab them in the neck with my pen. In fact, a few hours ago I wanted to do that. Luckily, I’m too afraid of the consequences to act on those RAGE feelings.
Anyone other CS majors notice that people there are incredibly infuriating? Maybe it’s just my college.[/quote]
What kind of po-dunk HS did you go to that did not have brick or concrete walls?
I’m typically a very calm guy, but I do have a soft spot for careless fucking drivers. I ride a bike in the city during rush hour. The moment someone cuts me off, crowds me in or pretends to not see me, I automatically blurt out an obscenity towards the offending driver. Gets me every single time, no matter how calm I am. I’ve even told my neighbour to FUCK OFF!! when she pulled out of her driveway and nearly T-boned me. The look of shock on her face…
Regardless, you just have to step back and think about the consequences. In that moment of rage where steam is coming out of your ears, visualize that hole in the wall, or that broken laptop you’re gonna have to replace. Chances are you’re gonna calm down pretty fuckin quick… or at least find a less expensive item to destroy.
You should also try to mellow out a little more and let things roll off your back. Don’t let things eat away at you and don’t let them accumulate. Might help to talk about “your feelings” to someone who’d actually listen to you.
What should I do? Anyone else have this problem? I don’t really believe in anger management counseling; if it was helpful, I would go, but based on my previous experiences, it isn’t helpful. Any ideas?[/quote]
Don’t ask questions that you don’t want an answer to.
If you are so smart about what you think works and what doesn’t, why are you fucking stuff up and feeling like an asshole?
If you actually wanted help you would go get it, not bitch on the internet about your “problem”.
What should I do? Anyone else have this problem? I don’t really believe in anger management counseling; if it was helpful, I would go, but based on my previous experiences, it isn’t helpful. Any ideas?[/quote]
Don’t ask questions that you don’t want an answer to.
If you are so smart about what you think works and what doesn’t, why are you fucking stuff up and feeling like an asshole?
If you actually wanted help you would go get it, not bitch on the internet about your “problem”.
[/quote]
GFT
also… The only thing that bothers me more than obese people bitching and moaning is people with anger issues. Get over yourself… anger gets you nowhere… if you for some reason are in some way incapable of controlling your emotions O__o then pick up an activity that will help you vent.
edit: and yes I had anger issues in my early teens… I’m Persian, that was def not tolerated by my family. Reason I don’t have anger issues now is because I grew the fuck up and stopped acting like a child.
This is a great video about being aware of your mind that stefanogym touched on.
Try this, when you feel anger stop and acknowledge you are angry and ask yourself why you are angry. You have to realize that feeling anger only hurts yourself. Feeling angry doesn’t feel nice, it feels terrible and just tell yourself to let it go. The anger feels like it’s evaporating away. It’s a very empowering feeling. It’s really hard to explain it, I recommend you watch the video.
It will stop when the consequences become so great that you actually decide to do the work to find the source, accept it, integrate it, and overcome it.
For me it took leaving home at 16, being a complete menace to society, serving 3.5 years in prison, getting stabbed five times and alienating half of my family.
My Dad always told me, “if your gonna be dumb, you’d better be tough”.
I agree that anger management therapy is bullshit. I’ve beat pillows with tennis rackets and yelled at the top of my lungs 'till I was blue in the face and it didn’t treat the problem. Rugby was FAR better than therapy for me. Where else do you get to beat the shit out of people for 80 minutes and have them buy you a beer afterwords?
Again, it only treated the symptom and gave me an outlet. The flaw in that strategy is that you will get old. Three knee surgeries, several broken bones and two screws in my shoulder now keep me off the field. So finally when I was thirty, I actually had the maturity and mental/spiritual perspective to actually do some meaningful work. I have not lost my temper in over five years. Haven’t even come close (and I had a VERY nasty divorce and lost half my assets, etc…).
Bottom line, when you run out of excuses to do the work, and when you find the courage to step into your pain, you will be able to change. Until then, try not to break expensive shit. Good luck
because i’m such a pussy, i generally don’t do much damage when i take my rage out on objects…unless i’m wearing boots. but anger has been a serious issue with me in the past. my job was kinda-sorta on the line for a moment when the owner caught wind of my punchy-outbursts (ooh yea, and headbutting!) so that kinda helped me calm down, although occasionally i do dig my fingers into my flesh or literally bite my tongue when an annoying customer pisses me off. but i’ve learned to channel my anger into weight lifting! tonight, for instance, EVERYTHING was pissing me off! then i went to the gym (it was either that or the bar, and i’m trying very hard not to drink) and even though some shitbags were using the Squat rack FOR HALF A MOTHER FUCKIN HOUR (and not squatting or doing deadlifts, i might add) i was able to do enough heavy lifting which not only calmed me down but also cheer me the fuck up.
also, my employee told me that since i quit drinking i’ve been in a better mood. i think that’s bullshit, but whatever…
Yesterday I was at Walmart and was walking through the sporting goods department. I needed to buy a bat because me and some friends were going to the batting cages later. I was walking by the flat screens and noticed that the same TV I just bought at Best Buy was on sale at Walmart for $1000 less. So I did what any rational person would do and proceeded to smash all 29 sets with the bat to ensure no one got a better deal than me.
[quote]Davinci.v2 wrote:
Yesterday I was at Walmart and was walking through the sporting goods department. I needed to buy a bat because me and some friends were going to the batting cages later. I was walking by the flat screens and noticed that the same TV I just bought at Best Buy was on sale at Walmart for $1000 less. So I did what any rational person would do and proceeded to smash all 29 sets with the bat to ensure no one got a better deal than me.
Up until a few years ago I used to have angry breakdowns in my room where I would turn red and hot and start to sweat, then I would lose it and start punching and stabbing everything in my room with knives (mattress, chairs, boxes, etc). Once I wore myself out I would sit there fuming, and eventually I’d cool off.
This was brought on by one little thought that annoyed me, then it would multiply in my head over and over. It was almost like an upper teen/adult tantrum, only more dangerous and probably more ridiculous looking. This stopped happening when 1. I got a little bit older and learned to control myself a lot better, and 2. I started spending my anger in the gym. They both work really well.
[quote]Davinci.v2 wrote:
Yesterday I was at Walmart and was walking through the sporting goods department. I needed to buy a bat because me and some friends were going to the batting cages later. I was walking by the flat screens and noticed that the same TV I just bought at Best Buy was on sale at Walmart for $1000 less. So I did what any rational person would do and proceeded to smash all 29 sets with the bat to ensure no one got a better deal than me.
[quote]Davinci.v2 wrote:
Yesterday I was at Walmart and was walking through the sporting goods department. I needed to buy a bat because me and some friends were going to the batting cages later. I was walking by the flat screens and noticed that the same TV I just bought at Best Buy was on sale at Walmart for $1000 less. So I did what any rational person would do and proceeded to smash all 29 sets with the bat to ensure no one got a better deal than me.
When I get pissed off, I stalk around the gym looking for a guy smaller than me so I can sit down on his weights while he’s deadlifting and I just AMOG the FUCK out of him.
