Yeah, I rule.
…or something.
Luckily most of my posts are devoid of content and deep meaning, so they’re easy on the brain!
My brain remains on call while my fingers type these posts out.
“My brain remains on call while my fingers type these posts out.”
Yeah, we can tell, DocT.
Dammit, that was uncalled for. I just felt like being an ass, yours was the first post to pop up, and you just left yourself, well, so wide open! I’m sorry, DocT.
And I would normally think about not submitting this post, but I don’t want to fuck up my post count…
By the way, CGB, I know what you mean, and I do agree with you…
#621!
Mike, you only agreed because it upped your post count. That’s like cheating, but even worse.
POST WHORE!!!
Try as you all might…
…But no matter what…
I’ll kick all of yer asses. Since we all know that whoever dies with the most posts, WINS.
Jared NFS: Do you really know what I do as a Exercise specialist? Do you know what my job is consits of? Here’s what a list of what I do in a day.
-
track personal training info we have over 200 clients.
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hunting, down clients who need to renew.
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maintain equipment
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Design programs that will keep members going to the gym.
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anwsering a ton of email from corprate or wellness dept of Goldman Sachs.
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Orginize “Brown Bag” activity.
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Schedualing
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Train clients.
Damn thats a full day. By, the way I train clients on my off time.
My job is more adminisrative work then anything. (with a fitness twist to it).
In Health,
Silas C.
Hey, CGB, I couldn’t help but notice your blatant attempt to up your count with your less-than-wordy “Hello” post on MBE’s thread…
Now that’s like cheating…
…only worse.
What there should really be is a real-content-to-bullshit percentage or ratio or something. If that were the way that things were scored, Kelly Baggett would be number one, with a 99.9999 (excepting only the post on this thread) score, and EC would be right behind him.
I can just see it now. Instead of flaming somebody for being a newbie, we’re gonna flame people for being post whores.
And CGB, I noticed that “Hello.” post as well. Very uncalled for … skank.
lot
I have to agree with P-DOG and say that the always sensational CUPCAKE should receive top honors for his work. You can always count on him to be very witty, clever and funny. The same goes for JWright, DAN C, and theSmileCreator. (Have you seen that guy? He’s totally hot. ) 
fitone, I completely understand your duties. I have friends that own their own gym, and train 40-50 hours a week. 40 hours a week is much more work than 40 hours for a guy like me, who has an office job. We get breaks, can pace ourselves, whatever, whereas trainers have to be “performing” for the whole 40 hours or however many that they’re training. It can be a very stressful job.
char-dawg, you’re forgetting that Tampa-Terry would have a rating of 1000% quality to 0% bullshit ratio.
The Education of a Post Whore
by Jared NFS
Some of you seem concerned with your placement, or lack thereof, in the Top 20. This post is here to help you learn how to properly elevate your posting, and thus receive the coveted crown of Top Post Whore, or secondarily, if that goal cannot be met, Assistant to the Top Post Whore.
While many posters feel the need to express something “useful” in every post, a true Post Whore knows that helfpul contributions to the Forum will only take you so far. I am going to share with you the secrets of some of the Top 20 Post Whores so that you may one day be able to achieve a position of prominence.
I will list some of the Top 20, and some examples of their favorite methods of inflation. Take notes.
poohbaya - “I’m going to such&such beach.” and “I just returned from such&such beach.”
Ms. Vedder - “For the last time, it’s spelled ‘bigprljamfan’, not ‘bigpearljamfanwholikesvedder’!”
char-dawg - “You ignorant slut…”
Timbo - “Gizzle, my fizzle…”
Nate Dogg - Posts consisting of the words “Renegade”, “I’d hit it”, and “nipple rings”
diesel23 - “These sumbitches have really pissed me off now…”
Christian Thibaudeau - He has his own forum. This is SO unfair to the true Post Whores.
JWright - “Jared, I’ve got a 12 incher for ya…”
fitone - explaining whatever he said before
Jared NFS - “For the last time, I’m not that fat Subway eunuch!”
Patricia - Responses to praise of her (fill in body part here).
Goldberg - He was covered earlier in the thread.
So you see, there are many ways to inflate your numbers and achieve true Post Whore status. I hope this has inspired you to true Post Whoredom, as I have sacrificed by not breaking it up into 15 different posts.
DISCLAIMER
If this post pissed you off, then it is highly likely that you did not “get it”, as it is just humor, and more specifically, sarcasm. I in no way am implying that any of the above posters actually inflate their posts with useless information. If you have concerns that I do not truly respect everybody here, please email them to me at blowme@uradolt.com.
Hope this helps!
If memory serves me and I’m pretty sure it does, the only post I have ever written that was helpful and or contructive in any way was back in February of this year when I instructed a poster by the name of GiganticGuns to check the back issues to find a bicep training program. I believe my response to his plea for assistance was:
“Do we really need to go over this again? Check the back issues, dumbass.”
So, that should put my real content to bullshit ratio somewhere around 1:00103
Patricia,
You wouldn’t even be in the running if we included posts from when the forum was originally formed. Char-dawg, Timbo, myself and just a few others would be way ahead of the pack.
By the way, my nipple rings get rave reviews from the ladies, I’d love to eat some pussy right now, and my Renegade Training program is kicking ass! I’m up 15 pounds and strength is coming back!