hot take, but I think I’d be willing to give up extreme positive emotion for guaranteed emotional stability at a “neutral”
Volatility is a negative in it of itself and very inefficient
The thought of giving up the highs scared that crap out of me when I was first getting medicated. If there is a line that marks the middle, I was terrified of stabilizing below that line, if that makes sense.
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That has been my sisters lifelong struggle. She never stays on her meds for more than a couple months, then its off to the races again.
Sad, because she’s actually quite brilliant, and has/had a big family that loves her very much.
We had a patient come into our clinic to see one of our med providers post-hospitalization, who wanted to refer her for therapy because meds aren’t her jam. This was one of many hospitalizations. Like, NO. I’m very willing to work with bipolar disorder, but not in someone who prioritizes the “highs” over stability and functionality. What is there for me to do as a therapist, put out the fires that are going to inevitably flare when she goes off the rails and hurts or angers the people who love her? Help her pick up the pieces of her failed relationships and criminal charges? PASS.
She was 51. At some point I start to think “hopeless,” because most people mature into willingness not to feel as if they’re doing primo cocaine (before it spirals into complete crazy) in order to avoid the downsides.
There seem to be ages at which people make these huge changes. Many drug addicts go into treatment in their late 20’s. By then their teeth may be starting to fail, they’re squatting in some hell hole, etc, and they take a deep breath and say “no more.” Alcoholics seem reactive to turning 40, on the other hand, because its impacts are less immediately devastating. They can pretend to be “partying” for a little longer.
Anyway, my point? I guess is that cold meds make me spacey and even more verbose than usual. So there you go.
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I was 27 when i was diagnosed, and had a couple of kids. My parents weren’t the best, and i realized looking back it was because my dad was bipolar (but never got medicated). I never wanted to be that guy, so I’ve been compliant with my meds for 25 years. I STILL miss the highs. It’s really hard to explain just how good they are (for a couple of weeks). I don’t really think there is a drug that equates to it, but i haven’t really done any drugs.
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Yeah. At that same age my sister was ramping up into another conflict that started with all of us siblings, and ended with her in jail in the next county east of here.
An “advocate” of some kind from the jail contacted me on facebook, and after some sleuthing to confirm she wasn’t a phishing scam, I called her. She wanted to discuss having my sister stay at my house because she had no address to release her to. I had to tell the woman that she wasn’t coming here because I have a wife and son to protect from her behavior.
Me and my brother that lives near by have been on a sort of “death watch” for several years now waiting on notification from the police that they have found her in some manner, dead. She’s a bit past the age when my mother committed suicide, and had referred to her a few times as an intimation, then veiled threat, then just outright said she would do the same thing if some unrealistic conditions or expectations weren’t met.
I finally told her that if she takes herself hostage she shouldn’t be surprised with the results. And that was the last I heard from her. 
.
Me too. Just passed 22 years sober in the beginning of October. I don’t know what exactly was wrong with my dad other than alcoholism, but there was quite a lot. I know I still have a way to go with a couple of problems, some undiagnosed until a couple years ago, some that developed along the way as I grew up.
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My 3-year old son started having seizures today.
Fuck the world.
I just want him to be happy and carefree watching paw patrol and playing with legos. Not having spasming legs, rolled back eyeballs, and leaving teeth marks on my fingers.
Anyway, it’s going to be an off week for me from the gym, since I’ll be sleeping on the hospital floor in case his EEG alarm goes off.
What caused it??? Geez bro… you’ll be in my prayers
He has floating harbor syndrome which is a mutation in the genes that regulate bone growth, among other things. So his brain is growing at a normal rate, but his skull is not, even with growth-hormone therapy, so he has a chiari malformation where the brain is pushing down on the spinal cord.
Seriously, fuck the world.
Praying for you and your family.
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I’m sorry man… I’ve experienced the pain of watching someone you love more than life suffer. I get it.
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Damn man. That is heart wrenching.
I’ll keep you & yours in my prayers.
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You and your family are in my prayers.
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Oh Brant, what a beautiful little boy. His happy jammies in combination with the bandage make me want to cry. Prayers for all of you.
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2024 has not been kind to you.
Sending all kindness and positivity your way I can.
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Since I’m sleep-deprived and stressed out, I’m going to act like a little bitch.
I ordered steak and eggs for breakfast from a restaurant near the hospital, since cafeteria food sucks, and this is what I got.
For $32.
I am about ready to storm that kitchen and fire everyone.
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You go get ‘em, with our blessing!
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Sending you, your wife, and that sweet little dude big hugs and lots and lots of prayers!
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Sending hope, strength and patience to you and your family! Take care of each other!
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