Just going on conversations I have had myself with elderly relatives, you’re more or less going to have to accept that she will believe that you are your father. I’ve had some great conversations with Auntie Olive, but you more or less have to accept that she will believe that she’s speaking to your dad. I just hope I’m that compos mentis when I get to that age. I’ve learnt all sorts of stuff about the statute of limitations that I wouldn’t otherwise have known. Just talk to her.
Yes, your single experience is definitely generalizable to every old person ever. Absolutely.
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I remember your name but can’t remember what I remember you for.
I have the advantage and disadvantage of living near the reservation where grandparents (my mother’s parents) live. My wife and I adopted my niece and nephew due to my brother being an idiot.
They had a school project where they were to ask their elders a series of questions about their experiences and to record it. It’s a national thing for all school kids. NPR actually picked this up and played some of the interview of my grandparents (among a whole host of other people).
Anyway, the questions are online at NPR and served as great conversation starters.
Some is basic stuff: what is your earliest memory? Where did you live? What was it like? What was your mom and dad like? Did you know your grandparents? What were they like? When did you first vote in an election? Who did you vote for? Why? What was your first job? Who was your best friend at school? What was my mom/dad like as a kid? What was your favorite job? What food do you miss from childhood? Etc.
It was truly fascinating.
My grandmother told me a really fun story about stealing her sister’s brand new outfit, complete with hat, and getting stuck in a downpour in it. I would add to your list to ask about times they got in trouble. Really epic stuff, old-timey bad kid stories.
I also remember a rat-in-the-well story she told that had me grossed out and completely captivated.
Yeah, there are a lot of “What happened that scared you the most as a kid? Did you ever have a fist fight, and why? etc.”
I am rather happy to have heard it all.
Crazy the shit that the older generation have seen. My gran was 95 when she died. She saw 2 world wars. Imagine how hard that’d have sucked.
We don’t think about the little things the past generations did differently. Everyday things. My gran washed clothes by hand. Can you imagine how much that’d suck? She washed nappies (diapers) by hand! Fuck that!
Sounds to me like being in a past generation would suck. Very glad I was born in 85.
Mine didn’t get paid in real money. My pap was paid in company scrip. The whole neighborhood also had fruit trees in every yard and sizable vegetable gardens. They’d trade between each other and virtually everybody was really good at canning fruits and vegetables.
My grandfather raised veal calfs as a kid to make money. He got shot with rock salt shotgun shells as a 9 year old for tormenting the town Democrat on halloween. His parents didn’t even mind. Told him he deserved it for being a nuisance.
His grandfather ran a still on our property during prohibition.
Lots of interesting stuff to find out.
I remember stories my mother’s mother told me about moving from the Nova Scotia valley to North West Cove to be a teacher at 16. It was a one room school house (circa 1919) in a rural fishing community. She described it as very lonely. The teacher lodged with a local family but was seen as a class above so people didn’t really get friendly. She also had to discipline big, local kids who were almost her age and didn’t really care to be there at all. She had a lot of great stories. I found them fascinating but she was also very smart and on the ball until her death at 90.
Tell her the money she gives you for your birthday, while a nice gesture, just isn’t getting the job done and that it’s to the point where it’s barely worth the effort to open the envelope.
That should get you off the hook for any conversation and you should be free to go.
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